About the Author


Dr. Michael Tobin

Dr. Michael Tobin has been a practicing psychologist for 38 years, and for the past 25 years he's been in private practice in Jerusalem. He specializes in marriage and family therapy and has been a professional trainer and supervisor since 1992. He has led numerous workshops for couples in Israel and the United States and developed an interactive series of family dramas that were performed throughout Israel . Dr. Tobin is the founder of the critically acclaimed website, www.wholefamily.com, which received finalist status in the family category of the internet academy awards. Dr. Tobin is the author of numerous articles on marriage and family and is the co-author of a book on marriage published in English, Hebrew, and German. Dr. Tobin is married to Dr. Deborah Risk Tobin and they have lived in Efrat with their family since they made aliyah in 1986.


Those Little Annoying Things

You don't restore a marriage by getting the other to do your will. You transform a relationship by creating love, collaboration and respect.

Ask the Rabbi/Psychologist: My Father’s Affair

Should I tell my mother?

Ask the Rabbi/Psychologist: The Enabler

I'm ashamed for enabling my husband’s verbal abuse.

Ask the Rabbi/Psychologist: Mother-In-Law from Hell

Should I tell my husband it’s me or her?

Ask the Rabbi/Psychologist: Fighting Daughters

How do I get my daughters to stop fighting with each other?

Ask Rabbi/Psychologist: Pushing Kids to Excel

Should I push my daughter to play piano publically so she can develop her full potential?

Ask Rabbi/Psychologist: Career versus Marriage

Our marriage is not my husband’s priority. I had no idea that I would be a slave to his career.

A Question of Character

After catching her fiance in a serious lie, should she go ahead with the marriage?

The Marital Crisis

Time does not heal all wounds.

Working Toward Love

Love is not mystical. If you want the benefits of a deeply committed and loving relationship, then you have to put in the effort to make it happen.

A Ten-Year Power Struggle

A power struggle can only continue if both antagonists "play the game."

Marital Games

A couple is caught in the common marital game called "Who is the Biggest Victim?" where the two competitors vie for the position of whose needs are more legitimate.

10 Things Never to do in a Marriage, Part 2

Transform a relationship mired in negativity into one based on trust and safety.

10 Things Never to do in a Marriage, Part 1

Transform a relationship mired in negativity into one based on trust and safety.

Ten Terrifying Truths about Marriage

Get rid of the illusions and let your marriage soar.

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