Mastering Joy

Torah Reading: Be'halot'cha

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Published: October 15, 2005

Visitor Comments: 8

(8) Lea, November 16, 2005 12:00 AM

just wanted to say

I cant believe you can get this on a podcast, I'm loving it.

(7) Carole Koehn Bishop, November 6, 2005 12:00 AM

I just listened to Rabbi Pliskin's "Mastering Joy" and it lifted my spirit. I had been so depressed over something that I chose to dwell upon and his message made me see that I could choose differently. Thank you. Carole Koehn Bishop

(6) marty carmack, November 5, 2005 12:00 AM

Right on. A grateful heart allows God's blessings!

The happiest person I know has a tiny house, a postage stamp back yard, which she calls her south forty, as she grew up in New York City in one room with her monther and grandmother. They cooked on a hot plate. Eileen's wealth is her grateful heart. It is amazing the wonders of life that come into her life.

(5) Anonymous, November 4, 2005 12:00 AM

i appreciate your services Thank you

(4) rahel bat akiva, November 1, 2005 12:00 AM

marjorie: all the best

marjorie: You are on the right track, my friend. 2 years ago, after 29 years, I left an empty marriage to someone who never understood my "yiddishkeit". I kept compromising my observance level hoping that we could be on par...it was not to be. I finally left and have not looked back once! The first thing i wanted to do was to reconnect to my Judaism...attend events and look for a shul. I came across Aish a couple of towns away. I now attend services regularly, go to all the events and have made new friends. I hope that you will seek out a frum community. People there are anxious to share their homes, Shabbat celebrations and learning. It's inspiring and uplifting. I am sad some of the time, but it doesn't get the better of me. I know things are moving in the right direction. I look forward to moving into the Aish neighborhood so that I, too, can host people for Shabbat and support Jewish learning. Marjorie: you have a lot to look forward to. Meaningful experiences will structure your life and give it purpose. I wish you all the best.

(3) marjorie, October 30, 2005 12:00 AM

i am struggling to emerge fom a lengthy bout of depression and separation from my judaic background.i want to reestablish my connection to the jewish community and find a shul. i believe this is the way for me to live joyfully.

(2) cr, October 30, 2005 12:00 AM

You can do it Marjorie

Marjorie,

Mazel tov on coming out of your depression. Keep up the struggle, it is worth it.

Connecting with your Jewishness, connecting with G-d, definitely makes life more joyful as the attitudes of Judaism, especially Chassidic Judaism, are so much about maintaining simcha, or joy, while dealing with the challenges of this world. Indeed, we were put here, in part in order to overcome our suffering in the face of these challenges with love and joy.

However, it is important to know that changing the external activities and surroundings of your life, though important, (they will help) are not complete in and of themselves. Learning what it means to be a Jew, what it means to have the gift of Torah, the gift of having a very special bond with G-d takes time. Yiddishkeit does change our thinking, and does lift us from despair or depression, but remembering how to be a Jew (we all knew before we were born, some of us just forgot and need our memory refreshed), how to eat, think, breathe and think like a Jew takes a bit of time. Remembering how to be joyful can take time too.A good joke or two can help also!

You can do it, go slow, let your passion for your wonderful birthright burn long and steadily. Be gentle with yourself and move at the pace that is right for you.

If you are looking for a shul in your neighborhood, try chabad.org or have a live chat with a Rabbi or Rebbetzin at askmoses.com. Or write to AISH for a recommendation.

You should have alot of success. Your connection to all Jews and all things Jewish is already, immutably intact, (just not apparent, it is their at the soul level)and all you have to do is jog your memory. Go to a Shabbos meal! Read a good book-a good one for basic starters is Simple Words by Adin Steinsaltz.(Very basic but beautiful and uplifting).

Also, what is your Jewish (Hebrew or Yiddish name)? If you don't know or don't have one, a Rabbi can help you find one.

Also, you may want to look for an orthodox therapist, if you still feel you would like to speak with someone.

All the best and have a Good New Year

(1) Nehamashira, October 30, 2005 12:00 AM

Thankyou for reminding me once again to choose life and joy- because we may not be able to control what happens to us, or our 'natural endowments', but we CAN choose how we react to circumstances, and how we use our talents to bring blessing to others.

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About the Author

Rabbi Zelig Pliskin

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Rabbi Zelig Pliskin is a noted psychologist and prolific author of 24 books, including Guard Your Tongue, Gateway to Happiness, Gateway to Self Knowledge, Love Your Neighbor, Growth Through Torah, The Power of Words, Consulting the Wise, and the recent Life is Now. Rabbi Pliskin lives in Jerusalem, and is the director of Aish HaTorah's Counseling Center and a senior lecturer at Aish's Essentials program and the Executive Learning Center. He was ordained at the Telshe Yeshiva in Ohio and holds a degree in Counseling Psychology.