God's Complete World

I liked what Ben Shafat said about puzzle pieces. "you're part of the puzzle, some pieces just take a while to fit in." When putting together a puzzle, it's not always so easy to find the perfect spot for each puzzle piece. But every piece has its place. Y. Pollack, think about your interests and ways you can get involved in chesed. Find something that you can do, whether it's volunteering to drive for a chesed organization or visiting someone who's old or sick. Find your niche and you'll discover a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction from within. Doing for your community will eventually help you lead the life you wish you had! Hatzlacha Rabba! And never give up! We're all cheering you on.

Really beautiful and heartfelt, " you Matter " just what I needed to hear tonight. Thank You!!

Yosher koach Lori! What a beautiful analogy. May HASHEM continue to bless you, your family, and the rest of us with all that is necessary to appreciate and enjoy this amazing puzzle. Shalom, Michael

SHALOM LORI, YOU'RE RIGHT WE ARE UNIQUE AND SPECIAL BECAUSE OUR CREATOR IS UNIQUE AND SPECIAL, THAT'S WHY WE MATTER AND ALSO YOU ARE SO RIGHT G-D HAS A POURPOSE IN OUR LIVES.

I forgot to thank the author of this piece. It is pretty intense. Did you ever feel like you weren't great at something? Well thanks to this video, you have to reconsider what your abilities are and how you can achieve your goals - you have some sort of job on this earth, make sure you do it! We need your help! Remember, if the piece doesn't fit, then try something else. You can't change the piece of the puzzle or the whole picture gets ruined (no need for plastic surgery, be happy with you.) When you mess around things end up worse, just stick with what G-d gave you, trust me, He knows more than you do...really.

Hey Yisrael. I'm not sure who wrote this but it kind of reminds me of well me...the old me that is. I'm not suggesting anything about anyone but I used to be Mr. Negative, I could find a problem with everything and I believed no one liked me - and you know what - I was right. No one wants to be around a sulking negative nelly, so I decided after spending a big chunk of my life a pessimistic sad guy, to try being positive. No one said hi to me in the synagogue, so I just started saying hi to folks. And you know what? People started saying hi back! Eventually everyone was saying hi to the new friendly guy (me). It was hard and took a bit of time but it built up. I gained a new group of friends and acquaintances and they said they have a great girl for me. But I still needed to test my new positive attitude after things didn't work out until things did. It took a pretty long time, but being positive after a bad night felt better than being negative after a bad night. And also, there are times when you're alone - yup, no one to talk to. It might be on the way to work or school or who knows when. It happens. That's when you get to know you the best, can you deal with you? If you're being negative, probably not. But a positive you a pleasure to be around. Sometimes I just smile like a nutty character when alone and it makes me feel great. If no one smiles at you, smile at them...smile at yourself if you have to, its the coolest feeling (mirror smiles, it is great!) So Yisroel and everyone out there, I am wishing you the best of luck and if this was really written by someone, I figure there is some exaggeration so its not as bad as you think. You can do it and we need you to, come on buddy, you're part of the puzzle, some pieces just take a while to fit in. But if you put in the effort then the pieces will come together. Best of Luck to you and everyone (we need it NPT)!!

Hi Lori, Thanks for this weeks article. I feel compassion toward Yisroel since reading his comment. Yisroel, I can't begin answer your question... "Why"....... why good things aren't happening for you. I simply don't know. I do know that Lonliness can be overwhelming. Some here have offered you kindly advice. Perhaps first, a talk will help, first praying Why to G-d and then speak with your Rabbi. Pray for honesty and understanding. Lori, I've bought several $1.00 puzzles at yard sales, usually with the boxes taped shut. I HATE it when pieces are missing, not because the puzzle is never going to be complete, but because of the time I spend looking for somethng that is NOT there!! I understand our uniqueness and our importance to G-d. My analogy to the missing puzzle piece is different. Translating a missing puzzle piece to a person is that sometimes we spend years looking for some good in someone and find that the good just isn't present. That the person is lacking a part, maybe it's the absence of compassion, or the inability to love or to be kind. You're right, we are all unique, like snowflakes. Lewis Black made the snowflake analogy in one of his standup routines. Don't we all feel sometimes like we are a puzzle with a piece missing?

That was a nice clip, Lori! Thank you!

I don’t know that I’m particularly angry, but I definitely feel sad and melancholy and dejected, to the point of often appearing awkward. I’m very lonesome and unconnected. I feel like there’s no one out there for me, and that no one even bothers to consider what my situation might be like. That of course serves their purpose well. I can’t blame them for not caring: the minute I do, they can produce the ignorance defense. It doesn’t even dawn on them. Helpfulness depends on prior awareness and sensitivity to someone’s plight. But I’m not angry. We all have our things and our preoccupations. Few of us have the luxury of being able to set them aside and attend to the emotional and social needs of the next person (unless the two people’s needs coincide). I will say, though, that the kind responses and suggestions from the followers of “Lori Almost Live” are all very heartening and encouraging. May the A-lmighty redeem us from the travails that beset us and make us find happiness.

Yisroel, as someone commented, please notice how many people who don't know you are pained by your suffering. But, as others commented, if you feel that people hate you, you need to ask yourself some questions and you need help working through the answers. If stangers on Aish.com care about you, but people who know you cross the street to avoid you, then obviously an encounter with you is unpleasant for them. Ask yourself why, without falling into the trap of feeling attacked or worthless. As others pointed out, G-d loves you and you need to love yourself. Others will love you if you love yourself AND if you love them. "K'mayim panim l'panim, ken lev ha'adam le'adam: As a face is reflected in the water, so too is a person's heart reflected in another." Look at yourself and others with a kind eye, don't be critical of yourself or them, don't make demands or try to control others, think about other's needs and try to be helpful in an uncontrolling way, and they will cross the street to greet you. This is not a matter of blame. But you need to find out what is the source of bad feelings that you are reflecting to others. With professional help, you can tap into your good, lovable essence and learn to see it in others as well. May Hashem bless you with the strength you need to find happiness.

I feel bad for your situation but you have to understand that i''m sure there is someone who is meant for you and who loves you. I''m sure you can find someone and if you can''t always remember that g-d loves you and he loves you more than anybody else can ever love anyone. Maybe you should go get a blessing from a leading rabbi - and you should know that he will love you - because each and everyone of us are brothers- the great rabbis see this more than we are able to see it. The people who aren''t loving you are mistaken. Please don''t take this out on them. They don''t know better. Ask for some guidance from above in your prayers as well as from a rebbi if possible. All the best, and good luck

Very nice Lori, well said - there is a cosmic plan, a place in the Puzzle for each one of us isn't there. How overwhelming the events of our lives can be, but reassuring there is a level of Order and Purpose to it all.

Hi Yisroel, Your pain is deep and real.You asked the question which is a great first step. Now be honest and answer Laura's question. There is no way your answer is yes. Please do yourself a favor and get help in the form of a qualified person or books like rabbi Pliskin's or rabbi Twersky's. The fact that people whom you've never met care about you is encouraging, no? surely there are people who know you who care even more. Are they the people you want should care is the question.Hatslacha and keep working on yourself. Happiness is not a destination, it is a way of life. (not my own)

Today give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day.

Yisroel, my heart goes out to you. You sound like an intelligent person and it's hard to believe that people dislike you to such an extent. However, if it's true you must see a professional councelor (psychologist, coach) who will objectively analyze the problem and help you. I'm sure that with the right guidance and with Hashem's help, you can overcome this problem. G-d bless you.

Yisroel, Hashem Loves you, unconditionally!! Turn to Him, tell him your pain as you would tell your father and He will Answer and Help you. Keep this up even if you are not answered right away and you will see a change for the better. Be persistent, don't give up. Try to happy even if you don't feel happy. Do this by acting happy on the outside. Eventually, you will feel it inside. And remember there is no such thing as despair!! For one who believes in Hashem, everything is possible. Be strong!! And may Hashem Bless you with all your desires for good!!!

There is yet another lesson to be learned from your amazing analogy. That is, that we can never know the importance of any given piece of the puzzle and why it is even part of the puzzle until we complete the puzzle and can see the whole. Unfortunately, the only time we can see the entire "puzzle" of our lives is after our lives are finished and complete. Therefore, it is incumbent upon each of us to value each "piece" that comes across the panorama of our individual life puzzles, whether it be another human being, an event, or even a hardship, for we can not know where it fits into the entire pattern. If we reject any piece, G-d forbid the entire puzzle might then be damaged and distorted.

Hi Yisroel, just read your comments...frankly, I have to ask, "Why are you so angry?" But I have to ask in response to the question, "Then how come nobody likes me?" I have to ask, do you like yourself? Um, do you take the step of saying "hello" to a passerby first. Happiness comes from within...if your angry at the world, some will perceive that you, yourself are angry...we do not want that, do we? I remember once that Captain Steuben on the Love Boat once told his daughter Vicky, that if you want a friend, you have to be a friend.

Dear Lori, it's so affirming to hear what I have been saying, over and over. We all need that affirmation, and perhaps, God put you here, today, for me in addition to so many others. I know deeply that you are speaking from a deep place, and that this is truth. This is a profound journey of soul. We are each of us here for a reason. I see below me, as I write, commentaries about pain, about suffering, individual quest for meaning in a world that seems to have turned against the individual writing. This I can say, having worked in the Clinics for a long long time, and having loved this "job". None of us escapes suffering. But suffering itself brings us, hopefully, ultimately, to another place, a place that is transcendant and it brings others to us, in ways that are about healing, about tikkun olam. When you are in the midst of deep despair, it seems that God has forgotten you, that there cannot be a God and yet, I am saying God is right there. It's that story about footsteps in the sand. In looking down the years, in getting perspective, having moved away from the moment, we can see deep threads we never saw before and that somehow, our stories, created us. If we learn to love ourselves, our unique, most beautiful selves, we have to forgive the story that brought us to this place in the recognition that story itself, has formed us, as surely as clay at the potter's wheel. It's a difficult concept and one not easily embraced in the face of terror and the terrible things that happen, that we read about, and that so often hit home. It's hard, very hard, to come to this realization but it's also very beautiful, to "arrive". What we can all do, however we are feeling, moment by moment, is to try to make this world a better place for others, for each other. And this, too includes a reverence for Nature, which is surely, yes, the universal teacher through deep and ongoing metaphoric connects that do apply to each and all of our lives. Take the time to smell a rose. Rejoice in a child's laughter. Teach another something special that is yor passion. And find somehow, the uniqueness and commonality that binds this one ness, that is this world and us, to each other.

Then how come nobody likes me? Why does everyone go away when I come along? Why will no one say a word to me when I'm around? Why does it seem that all the people in the neighborhood are trying to avoid me? Why will not a single passerby cast me a smile? Why are all so quick to rebuke me? Why am I left out when the invitations are mailed? Why does my phone never ring, except for an occasional wrong number? Why won't any girls accede to my overtures? Why do the shadchanim laugh when they get my call (with the phone covered, of course)? Why do the people move on to the next person when saying good shabbos after davening in shul? Why does no one think to approach when I'm standing on the side? Why do familiar faces cross over to the other side of the street when I'm spotted in the distance? Why?

I love what you said that I matter, sometimes I have wondered when I am feeling sorry for myself. I find nature certainly reminds me of God''s uniqueness and that every detail is important especially when one is close to nature you can feel the soil in your hands and then it brings forth life in the Spring, so likewise God is renewing me everyday.

So inspiring, wow! Just wow. The story with the puzzle just amazed me! "When one puts a puzzle together and realizes that there is a piece missing and never would put it together again...but still what is the big deal with one missing piece?! The puzzle still looks interesting and all that but still something is really wrong with this puzzle. Every person in this world matters. We are all pieces of Gods puzzle and we are all here to complete the puzzle. We all matter. And we are here for a reason! So beautiful! Wow! Thanks!

It's important to remember that we are all here for a reason. But sadly, not everybody thinks that way, particularly those who are "driven" to suicide like the Myspace case with that young girl who was told by someone she thought initially was a nice boy, but was eventually told by "him" that "the world will be better off without you." Anyone being told this is certainly testing, and of course not everyone is suicidal since many people do think things thru, as the Jewish bible is strong on promoting the gift of life...As for the world being so incomplete, there are agnostics who will argue "is this the best that G-d can do?" and atheists who will argue about the dangers of religion and say that G-d is "imaginary"...There is good reason to believe in the Almighty since things do work out towards the end of any or all situations. I ought to be more thankful that I can wake up to another day not necessarily knowing what good will happen or what will work out for me.