Video: Thinking and Overthinking

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Published: December 26, 2009

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Visitor Comments: 18

(18) Joey, May 18, 2012 8:37 PM

Thank you for this, and God bless!

(17) David C., June 21, 2010 8:43 AM

Hey, Lori Palatnik's right on this...

I totally AGREE with her. Don't even overthink! Shesh! I get nervous when I do that.

(16) Anonymous, February 16, 2010 12:55 AM

when times like these happen often, is that a sign of a true medical condition which should get treatment?or is it better to just wait it out like Lori said?

(15) Natania, January 3, 2010 3:07 PM

Wow thank you, this made soo much sense! Looking forward to hearing more

(14) cinda, January 1, 2010 2:48 AM

contradicting view

But Lori, you contradict yourself...waiting is not acting...it seems the point is to act and not think so much...waiting is counterproductive and having yishuv hadas is waiting to be ablr to overthink...cinda

(13) Anonymous, December 31, 2009 6:25 PM

FEAR =Future Expections Aren't Realized

Future If you think back about all the things that you Expectations ever seriously worried about or that you were Aren't afraid of, how many actually happened? Realized Very few, or most likely, none.

(12) Lawrence M. Flait, December 30, 2009 3:15 PM

Kissinger and action

I saw Dick Cavett interview Henry Kissinger and Cavett remarked how amazing it must have been for K to be privy to the flowery historical discussions analogies Presidents must make during crises at the White House. Kissinger responded, no, Mr. Cavett, Presidents are atheletes - not intellectuals - they act and rationalize it later.

(11) Isaac, December 30, 2009 11:31 AM

Fear is Subjective; & Decision Making

The type of "Fear" expressed in the episode is a psychological frame of mind - and subjective (not objective). Like in a lab - controlled roller coaster ride, and not like facing an ocean Tsunami - where there the danger is genuine. But more important is Lori's final advise - where truly good decisions should be thought out - when the individual is in "One" with the Creator and the Universe. As the word indicates - Uni (uno or one) - verse (song) - when you are in one song(in harmony). And after the decision - you are left to follow up with "action" (and no "Over-Thinking"). Like a concert pianist - who rehearses and rehearses, but at the performance - he doesnt think anymore - and just performs.....he allows his entire being to "flow with action" in harmony and in "one song". There you were -with feet dangling freely in the wind over a deep canyon - you kept your "Faith"....and enjoyed!

(10) Dalit, December 30, 2009 9:00 AM

what an important message

Hi,/Shalom its my first time visiting Lori Live(almost) and loved it. It was nice to hear a womans' wise words.also...and actualy when it comes to thinking I think women tend to have more of a problem with... overthinking. and so doJews in general-a cultural trait! I thank you Lori for such wise words. all my life I have been struggeling with making decesions and it often seemed more urget to decide when, I am "charged" with emotions and the topic is close to heart... its been such a strong part of me that I was not fully aware of it! I will keep this advise close to heart-life is too short for us to miss opportunities due to overthinking and worrying and too short for us to rush into important decesions,actions while our thinking is "fogged".

(9) Anonymous, December 30, 2009 8:19 AM

thinking

It's a complex subject. I do not agree with the popular view. I think that our children deserve respect for their fears.

(8) Shelah W, December 30, 2009 2:04 AM

Anxiety relief

I was just thinking about how to deal with anxiety attacks and then came across this lesson. It fits so well and was delivered so beautifully. Thanks Lori.

(7) Lev Yisroel, December 29, 2009 8:26 PM

I need to think about this. ;-)

(6) ruth, December 29, 2009 6:55 PM

what IF...

I think the message is good but the metaphor is bad. Why? because I do know plenty of people, myself included, who have done just this, have taken the plunge. And the effect was not beautiful. I have a fear of heights, meaning I am not one of those people who go up high on those very tall waterslides and then allow myself to take what others say is an exhilarating ride. I also don't like speedy rollercoaster rides. They scare me. And yet, Yes, I have done this, and I have even been dared to do this, so I did. I didn't have a great time. I was terrified. I remained terrified and was glad to be back on terra firma. So this analogy wouldn't have worked if the results had been different. And I think maybe it's not so good to be pushed, always into not thinking and to be told it will be good for you. Sometimes we get into a lot of trouble in life with that philosophy. So YES and, NO.

(5) dave, December 29, 2009 4:46 PM

avalanche

a person said something to his friend . the friend keeps thinking why did he say that to me thinking the whole night till the next morning he so upset. and really the friend didn't meen any thing by it (Rabbi Nachman)

(4) Jack Shattuck, December 29, 2009 4:34 PM

Lori's Zip Gliding

You cruel, cruel, Imah. You didn't say how old your daughter is. Rebbitzen, I love your Almost Live video's and watch them whenever Aish.com has them on. Best wishes for the new year, from Claymont, Delaware

(3) Rosen, December 27, 2009 10:03 PM

balance of thought

It's important to have a balance of thought where we don't think too much or too little. A few things I have learned about thinking is knowing not just what to think, but HOW to think. And, when it comes to coping with a situation encountered, not only is there fight or flight, but there is also "freeze" where we overthink about the situation and replay it in our head constantly and even longer than the actual incident occurs.

(2) SusanE, December 27, 2009 8:03 PM

Great Advice about Overthinking

Thank you Lori for more good advice. Your listeners might also like to consider, When contemplating a job or chore to be done, don't think too much about it or agonize about it. Tomorrow when it's time to start the actual work you will be mentally weary and tired of it already from having done the job so many times in your head. Again thank you for great advice. ------------------------------------------------------------ Also, my thanks to all at Aish for the wonderful and insightful words I've enjoyed hearing here for the past several years. I hope to visit Aish in Jerusalem and to join in thanking all who have contributed to this great sharing of information and of unity between all Jews everywhere.

(1) Iris Moskovitz, December 27, 2009 4:49 PM

One cool momma! I give you credit for your adventurous side.

How often do all of us overthink on the silliest things in life? If we would only take that energy, and use it for positive actions, we would all get so much more accomplished than ever before. I love your words of wisdom. Maybe next time you can try scuba diving, if you haven't already. Just an idea, All the best.

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About the Author

Mrs. Lori Palatnik

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Lori Palatnik is a writer and Jewish educator who has appeared on television and radio, and is the author of "Friday Night and Beyond: The Shabbat Experience Step-By-Step," "Remember My Soul - What to do in Memory of a Loved One," and co-author of "Gossip: 10 Pathways to Eliminate It From Your Life and Transform Your Soul." She is a much sought-after international speaker, having lectured in the U.S., Canada, Mexico, U.K., Central America, South America, South Africa and Israel, including featured talks at Yale, Brown and Penn. She lives in the Washington D.C. area, with her husband, Rabbi Yaakov Palatnik. Lori is the Founder of The Jewish Women's Renaissance Project, an international initiative that brings over 1,000 women to Israel each year from ten different countries on highly subsidized programs to inspire them with the beauty and wisdom of their heritage. She is the busy mother of five children, ages 24 to 14; and her son, Zev, just finished serving as a sharpshooter in the IDF. Her weekly video blog, "Lori Almost Live" is a popular feature on aish.com, viewed by over 50,000 people each month.

Follow Lori on Twitter, @LoriAlmostLive

Thinking and Overthinking

Getting in the right frame of mind to make decisions

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