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Turning the Clock Back
Salomon Says

Turning the Clock Back

What do you regret most in your life?

by

Published: April 2, 2011


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Visitor Comments: 50

(41) rod rigo vallescas, October 23, 2012 7:59 AM

thanks.

(40) Anonymous, May 31, 2011 8:21 AM

I Cannot Erase the Past

Thank you Rabbi Saloman for this video. I’m sure it brings much hope to many who view it. My biggest regret is in a series of actions I got involved in over a total of 7 years. My family had some difficult times in relation to my elder sister and after some years it was diagnosed that she was suffering from schizophrenia that had gradually creped in. During the times of these difficulties I was in my teens and later university. Things got worst immediately after graduating and although I was brought up in a family with religion, I began to be angry and lose faith in HaShem… Then I started living a double life. I was the good boy at home, at work and with friends. But on the flip side I was indulging in pornography which slowly led to promiscuity and worse. Early last year I made a conscious decision to stop these things and to recommit myself to HaShem. The road has not been easy and many times I have fallen and still fall. Yet I draw strength from the Almighty and come to accept the people around me for whom they are, accept the situations life presents and try to live a righteous life. The difficult part is to live with the knowledge that you can’t erase what you have done but make atonement for it. It scares me that if I’m ever blessed to find my beshert I’ll have to be upfront about myself and my past (that’s tough considering I live in the East where our society is more conservative) SHALOM

(39) Anonymous, April 27, 2011 1:00 PM

RELATIONSHIP REGRET

I cannot forgive myself for being involved with a married man who had three children at the time and one on the way. I was also married at the time to a man who had a jealous, controlling nature. Being easily convinced, I became involved with the other man, who eventually became my second husband, I cannot forgive myself for the anguish I must have caused to that woman. I torture myself until this day with not being able to forgive myself. I did have a child with this man and I am still in touch with him periodically because of the child, who is now a young woman with a child of her own. Thankfully, the first wife has actually forgiven me and so have her grown children. They are very close and good to my daughter and consider her their sister, not just a half-sister. We all have a good relationship. The father of these 5 kids, now all adults, eventually divorced me after a marriage of 5 years, and is now married to his 4th wife. He is a good person and he did provide for his children and ex-wives. Now that he is much older, I think he has finally settled with his wife now of 13 years. I feel that I am the one who cannot get over this horrible sin. I muse also tell you that I have been raised a Christian but over the past year, I am reading more about Judaism and I have a strong connection to your beliefs. Even if GOD has forgiven me, I can't get this out of my mind and I am sure I will live with this guilt until my last day on this earth. It is a shameful thing that I did and I am TRULY sorry for not being a better person to have walked away at the time.

(38) Anonymous, April 18, 2011 5:39 PM

converting too late

Born to Christian parents and raised in that faith, I was drawn to Judaism starting at age 9. I put off converting for one reason and another over 3 decades. The best time would have been after a divorce in my early thirties, but I met and fell in love with a Lutheran. I put it off some more, finally giving up and admitting that Christianity was not for me AFTER our children were born. Two Reform rabbis and a Conservative rabbi encouraged and led me to convert anyway after a year of study. The impact on the children has been vaguely confusing because every religion is ultimately exclusive. I have never kidded myself into believing that I am a righteous convert. I also recognize that even without a formal conversion, my husband and I would be "intermarried" because I cannot embrace the core tenets of Christianity. Pretending would have been deceitful and perhaps more harmful. For all my regret of the difficulty my action has caused, there has actually been much good fruit. Without being conceited, I can honestly say that my husband has evolved into better man for the Jewish influence in his household, and he certainly has been a good influence for me in the pursuit of womanhood. I cannot undo, nor does he want me to. We will move forward with more open conversation. We are making it work for us, but I would never recommend intermarriage.

(37) Charles Goldgeier, April 7, 2011 6:19 PM

My youngest son

B"H Dear Rabbi Salomon: My biggest regret was that was not the compassionate and good father I should have been toward my youngest son. Now that he is 39 years of age, it is too late to recapture his early years. My youngest son is now quite emotionally distant from me. He does not share his life (joys, hopes, dreams, problems, difficulties etc.) with me or his mother. The unfortunate situation I find myself is tragically his older brother was killed in a car accident 9 years ago. He is now our only son and we are not close like parents and child should be. I am grateful for your videos and wish you and your family good health and a meaningul Passover. Shalom, Charles Goldgeier

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