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Mr. Good Enough

Should a woman ever "settle"?

Published: March 1, 2008


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Visitor Comments: 44

(44) Deenah, March 19, 2009 10:57 AM

Ok

Right now Mr. Good Enough happens to not be Jewish, a mensch, but a goy. The advice to this would then be "nonono he's not Mr. Good Enough even though you see yourself building a marriage with him" So do I move on? Plenty of fish in the ocean? Take the first Jewish guy that comes? Is common Jewishness enough to build a marriage on, all other things notwithstanding?

(43) Roxanne (goy), March 10, 2008 11:00 AM

Alone but not lonely

I'm naturally a lot better by myself, people bore me, are nasty, and tire me out usually. So the onerous task of finding a marriage partner is an effort that really doesn't interest me. I have zero interest in "raising a family" (it's hard enough taking care of myself!) so naturally I'd look for someone (or hope to happen upon someone, G-d willing) with a similar lifestyle interest.


However, I feel as long as I have my own roof over my head, my own clothing, my own food and a bit left over to spend I'm OK. I've seen too many miserable people coupled up with too many horrible people to really care too much about any of it.

But I also agree with the comments that said they'd be horrified if the extent of the marriage proposal either way was "Well, you're 2nd, or 3rd, or even 10th best so you'll do". I don't accept that. Romance and pretty faces get boring really fast if there's NO substance behind it, but there's also no substance if there's no spark, too.

The only thing I feel I can do witih this confusing mess is raise my hands and say whatever G-d wills is best. He knows better about stuff than I do anyway.

(42) Anonymous, March 9, 2008 10:21 PM

I think the Rabbi is right

After all, nobudy is perfect. Eve you, I or He. Eveb the couples.

(41) Anonymous, March 8, 2008 9:21 PM

Good Advice

I intend to heed this advice. I have spent the past 10 years alone after my divorce. My son will soon be thirteen. I regret not settling in time to provide him with a real family life and G-d willing, I will settle soon.

(40) David, March 8, 2008 6:27 PM

better for what? for whom?

I was married twice and am single now.
I'm calm and content
Marriage isn't for everyone

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