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Top Ten Gifts Every Wife Wants

Top Ten Gifts Every Wife Wants

This year give your wife the gift she really wants.

by

Hanukkah brings a special light that enables us to move from the ordinary into the extraordinary, from the mundane into the holy, from the finite limits of ourselves into the infinite spaces of connections. Since it has become a time for giving gifts, let us focus on giving to each other gifts that build our deepest relationships and shape our lives to reflect the beauty and strength of this pure light.

Here are the top 10 gifts just about every wife wants (two additional installments will address top 10 gifts husbands and children want):

  1. Appreciation. Recognize what she does. Thank her for her hard work. Express gratitude for the little tasks she takes care of that you may usually take for granted. Write a note. Send a text. Or say thank you as soon as you walk in the door.

  2. Compliments. Tell her she is beautiful. Compliment the dress that she is wearing or the color of her shirt. Give her positive feedback about her work. Tell her that she is an amazing mother. Tell her that she’s smart. Tell her that she’s talented. She needs to hear it especially from you.

  3. Empathy. Commiserate with her when she’s had a hard day. Listen to her. Say things like: It sounds like you had a really rough meeting. I can’t believe you stood on line for that long, you must have been so frustrated. You must be so tired from being up all night with the baby; it must have been really challenging managing everything at work today.

  4. Kindness. Be available to help. Fill up her car with gas. Fix her computer or offer to help her with a problem at work. Hold the baby. Do homework with the kids. Ask your wife if she needs anything. Give her a break. Apologize when you hurt her feelings. Be kind.

  5. Friendship. Be her friend. Go on dates together or spend focused time with each other. Do fun things together. Plan adventurous trips even if they will be short. Share your struggles. Encourage each other. Be happy for each other’s accomplishments.

  6. Affection. Tell her that you love her. Buy her flowers. Express how happy you are to be married to her. Tell her that she completes you.

  7. Respect. Research shows that the first thing to go in a marriage is politeness. We get too comfortable around those closest to us, and we forget to show them basic respect. Call her or message her when you’re running late. Even if it’s just five or ten minutes later than the time that she was expecting you. Hold open doors for her. Greet her. Smile at her. Look at her when you are speaking.

  8. Acceptance. Accept her weaknesses. Understand that she often sees things differently from you, remembers things differently from you, and handles things differently from you. Praise her strengths. Reassure her that you are always there for her.

  9. Authenticity. Be real with her. Share with her important experiences in your life. Tell her about what is happening at work. Express when you are worried, angry or sad. Don’t try to hide or deny your feelings.

  10. Laughter. Maintain your sense of humor especially in times of stress. Share inside jokes. See the lighter side of life. Eliminate mockery and sarcasm. Laugh with each other but not at each other.

One of the worst myths about gifts is that they are an all-or-nothing proposition. Either you give the right gift in the right way or you give nothing. But real gifts, especially in a marriage, have a lot of spaces in between. You learn to give a little and then you learn to give a little more. Sometimes your wife will be ready to receive what you have to give and sometimes she won’t. But every time you give, the gift creates a positive, precious deposit in your relationship.

Click here to read Top 10 Gifts for Husbands.

December 8, 2014

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The opinions expressed in the comment section are the personal views of the commenters. Comments are moderated, so please keep it civil.

Visitor Comments: 19

(13) Rose, December 23, 2014 2:46 AM

The best gifts are freely given from the heart

The simple gifts of a smile and a hug, have the power to brighten any day

(12) Anonymous, December 12, 2014 2:29 PM

What about actions not words

You don't say anything about lending a helping hand. How about helping with cleaning up after dinner. What about helping putting the children to sleep. Lending a helping hand goes a lot further than saying you did a great job.

(11) Jerry Davis, December 10, 2014 7:09 PM

Excellent list

BUT--This is a list for everyone, Husband,Wife, Children, Grandchildren --etc-etc-etc. Not just for a Wife

Scott Edelman, December 11, 2014 7:02 PM

Oy!

You hit the nail on the head! What you wrote is exactly what I was going to write. This is a list for everyone not only wives!!!

(10) Anonymous, December 10, 2014 12:06 PM

Thank you!

Very nice article, very true, very special. Thank you, I enjoyed it a lot!

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