10 Ways to Enjoy the Seder

Let's face it -- we have all experienced some pretty boring Seders in our days, or some that have turned into just another family dinner party devoid of meaning. In order to bring more meaning and enjoyment back to the family Seder, try the following:

1. Go to the dollar store and buy some "visual aids" for the plagues. When you get to that part of the Haggadah, throw out a pile of frogs...plastic cows and animals...snakes and spiders...ping pong balls (hail)...dark sunglasses (darkness)...Be creative and fun. The kids (and adults) will love it.
    
2. Buy some dollar store "prizes" for kids. When they ask a good question (which is what you're trying to stimulate), they get a prize. Also give prizes for asking the Four Questions, good singers, etc... The kids will keep busy playing with their prize (doll, soldier, etc.) until they think of another good question and jump back in.
    
3. Explain to everyone that they are like royalty on Seder night. And since kings and queens do not pour for themselves, everyone gets a "pouring partner" who fills up their glass with wine or grape juice (or a combo) at the appropriate time. People pair up and have fun with this.
    
4. Read the Haggadah in the language that you best understand. That means English is fine. Share the reading by going around the table and taking turns.
    
5. It's okay to stop during the reading for a good discussion on the topic at hand. You may want to prepare some questions in advance to throw out at people such as:

   - "If the Haggadah tells us that we are still slaves and not free, our definition of freedom must be very different. We are Jews in North America, aren't we free? What is the Jewish definition of freedom?"
   - "Next year in Jerusalem? How many of us really want to live in Israel? What does the Land of Israel mean to you?"
   - "The wise son doesn't sound so wise. He doesn't seem to know anything. What is the Jewish definition of wisdom?"

   There is no such thing as a dumb question. Encourage an atmosphere where people feel comfortable asking questions about what's being said in the Haggadah. Once a question is asked, invite everyone to think about a possible answer, and/or to look in their Haggadah to find one.

6. Tell everyone to eat a light meal before coming to the Seder. That way they won't be starving and want to hurry through the Haggadah. This is not a dinner party -- the reading and discussion of the Haggadah is the whole point of the evening! Let people know in advance that they will be reading through the Haggadah and discussing issues long before they begin eating. Don't let the meal become the focus.
    
7. Assign topics to present to various guests. For example, give someone the section on "The Four Sons" and get them to learn and discuss the meaning behind each son to present to everyone at the table.
    
8. Use the same Haggadahs so that everyone can follow. We highly recommend the ArtScroll edition. They also make a kid's version.
    
9. If you are trying to change the focus of the family Seder toward something more meaningful, try hosting it at your home this year ("home team advantage"), and always invite guests who are not family. When "guests" are there, even the most cynical family member is on their best behavior. Try it. It works.
    
10. In addition to Aish.com's Passover site, use "The Passover Survival Kit" by Shimon Apisdorf. It's available at your local Jewish bookstore and is filled with great tips and insights into making the Seder fun and meaningful. It's also a terrific source of questions to stimulate conversation, ideas on each section of the Haggadah, and more.