Letter From Mom
Moishe came home from work to find his wife Miriam crying. "Your mother insulted me," she sobbed.
"My mother? How could she do that when she is on vacation on the other side of the world?" Moishe asked.
"I know. But this morning a letter addressed to you arrived. I opened it because I was curious."
"At the end of the letter your mother wrote: P.S. Dear Miriam, when you have finished reading this letter, don't forget to give it to my son."
Bus or Bust
Chaim Yankel was visiting Washington, DC, for the first time. Unable to locate the Capitol, he asked a police officer for directions, "Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Capitol building?"
The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the number 54 bus. It'll take you right there."
Three hours later, the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, Chaim Yankel was still waiting at the same bus stop.
The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Capitol building, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus, and that was three hours ago! Why are you still waiting?"
Chaim Yankel replied, "Don't worry, officer, it won't be long now. The 45th bus just went by!"
Shmiel Teitlebaum was applying for a job and the employment application clearly stated: "Age of father and mother (if living).”
Shmiel wrote down 107 and 98 in the spaces provided.
“Wow, are your parents really that old,” the interviewer asked Shmiel.
“No,” Shmiel replied “But they would be if they were still living."