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Her Majesty and Max Pincus

When Queen Elizabeth heard rumors that Parliament was planning to tax the royal family on the same basis as private individuals, she began searching for a good tax advisor. She asked several billionaires and each whispered, "Max Pincus."

She turned to the Intelligence services to locate Max Pincus and received a report. Max, the report said, lives in Brooklyn, New York where he makes a living betting on horses. However, the report went on, there are rumors about Max making huge fees as an unregistered tax advisor. But since he is a heavy contributor to both political parties, the IRS and the rest of the government leaves him alone.

Through her embassy, it was arranged for Max to travel to London on a RAF transport and meet with the Queen secretly. "Have your husband and your accountant there," Max e-mailed.

At the palace, Max poured over the Queen's complicated financial reports. She was known to be the richest woman in Britain and Max took his time reading every paper. Finally, after several days of reading and questioning, he sat down with the Queen, Prince Philip and two chartered accountants.

"Foist," Max said, "because I got a Brooklyn accent, I will speak slowly. However, there are some woids better said in Yiddish, so if I use any, axe me for a translation, but it won't be as good."

"Queenie, you should shtup some gelt into trust funds for the aineklach. Forever you ain't gonna live and the inheritance taxes will fress up your estate like a chazzer. Next, you should write out of your will that shmegegi, your son Charles.

"Then you should stop schlepping and quickly set up a couple trusts for any charities you want to help."

But before he could continue, Philip interrupted. "I say. I would prefer if you would speak English. And I must insist on more respect when addressing her majesty."

Elizabeth turned to the Prince and, with a withering glance, said, "Phillip, please stop the narishkeit and let Mr. Pincus proceed. This man has lots of sechel He’s got a real Yiddishe Kop.”

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