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  • Torah Reading: Naso
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Going Down

A rabbi, priest, and minister die on the same day, and find that they are standing in an elevator with a seemingly silent elevator man who doesn't speak. The 3 men agree that since they all tried their best in life, the elevator would soon be moving upwards.

Suddenly, it was as though the elevator cables were cut, because they begin hurling downwards. The elevator slows and stops, the door slides open, and there's a bunch of red-hot lava in a huge vat with people screaming for mercy. The elevator man turns to the minister and says, "This is your stop, sir." Before the minister could react, he was flicked out by the elevator man.

The rabbi and the priest stare at each other in utter horror. The door slides closed, the elevator continues to free-fall, then it slows and finally stops. The door slides open, and there's an ocean of lava with people screaming for mercy. The elevator man says to the priest, "This is your stop, sir". The priest, in spite of clinging to the rail, is flicked out by the elevator man.

Free-falling again, the rabbi is saying viduy, Psalms, the Shema – you name it. The elevator slows, stops, and the door slides open. The rabbi, eyes clenched shut, is expecting the absolute worst, but instead he feels a caressing breeze, smells fragrant pine, and hears flutes, a babbling brook, and tinkling bells. He dares to open his eyes, and he sees a lush field with sheep, a forest, stream, and shepherd boys and girls. The elevator man says, "This is your stop, sir. Last stop."

As the rabbi is stepping out of the elevator, he can't resist asking the elevator man, "I don't understand – this place is lower than the first 2 places". The elevator man gazes off in the distance and murmurs. "It's amazing what the Zionists have been able to accomplish in just a few years."

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