Moishe in the Monastery

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Moishe Mandelbaum was fed up with humanity and decided to spend the rest of his life in a monastery. The head of the monastery warned him that he would have to take a vow of silence and live the rest of his life as a scribe, to which Moishe replied, "No problem. Anyway, I'm sick of talking."

Ten years went by, and the head of the monastery called for Moishe. He told him that he was a model resident and perfect scribe, and that they were very happy to have him. As per their tradition, he was allowed to say two words. Asked if he had anything to say, Moishe nodded and said, "Food cold."

Moishe was sent on his way. Ten years later, Moishe was brought before the head of the monastery again and once again told how pleased they were with his performance, and that he was again allowed two more words if he so chose. Moishe said, "Bed hard," and was sent back to work.

Another ten years went by, and again Moishe was called in for an audience, and he was allowed another two words. Moishe nodded and said, "I quit."

To this, the head of the monastery replied in a disgusted tone, "Doesn't surprise me. Moishe Mandelbaum, ever since you got here, you've done nothing but complain."

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