Accident Report

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Old Morty Epstein was testifying as a witness to an automobile accident. The following exchange took place between Morty and the lawyer:

Lawyer: "Did you actually see the accident?"

Morty: "Yes, sir."

Lawyer: "How far away were you when the accident happened?"

Morty: "Thirty-one feet, six and one-quarter inches."

Lawyer (thinking he'd trap Morty): "Well, sir, will you tell the jury how you knew it was exactly that distance?"

Morty: "Because when the accident happened I took out a tape and measured it. I knew some schnook lawyer like you would ask me that question."

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