A Perfect Landing
As the plane settled down at Ben Gurion airport, the voice of the Captain came on:
"Please remain seated with your seatbelt fastened until this plane is at a complete standstill and the seat belt signs have been turned off."
"To those of you standing in the aisles, we wish you a Happy Chanukah."
"To those who have remained in their seats, we wish you a Merry Christmas."