The Poker Game
Five Jewish gentlemen were playing poker one night when Meyerowitz loses $500 on a single hand, stands up, clutches his chest and drops dead on the floor.
Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five complete their playing time standing up.
Bash looks around and asks "Now, who is going to tell the wife?"
They draw straws. Nordheim, who is always a loser, picks the short one. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don't make a bad situation any worse than it is.
"Gentlemen! Discreet? I'm the most discreet mensch you will ever meet. Discretion is my middle name, leave it to me."
Nordheim schleps over to the Meyerowitz apartment, knocks on the door, the wife answers, asks what he wants.
Nordheim declares "Your husband just lost $500, and is afraid to come home."
She hollers, "TELL HIM HE SHOULD DROP DEAD!"
Nordheim says, "I'll tell him."