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Weighing Grossman Down

No matter what he did, Dr. Stern couldn’t get Herman Grossman to exercise. So he came up with a new strategy.

"I'm prescribing these pills for you," Dr. Stern said, as he weighed Mr. Grossman who tipped the scales at over two hundred and fifty pounds.

"I don't want you to swallow them. Just spill them on the floor twice a day and pick them up, one at a time."

Bubbie Shwartzbaum’s Purse

As the bus pulled away, Bubbie Shwartzbaum realized that she had left her purse under the seat. Frantic, she called the bus company and was relieved to hear later that the driver found her bag.

When she returned to pick it up, several off-duty bus drivers surrounded her. One man handed Bubbie her purse, two typewritten pages and a box containing the contents of her purse. "We're required to inventory lost wallets and purses," he explained. "I think you'll find everything there."

As Bubbbie started to put her belongings back into the purse, the man continued, "I hope you don't mind if we watch. Even though we all tried, none of us could fit everything into your purse. And we'd like to see just how you do it."

Beauty is Skin Deep

Little Moishie Handlesman watched, fascinated, as his mother gently rubbed cold cream on her face.

"Why are you rubbing cold cream on you face, Ima?" he asked.

"To make myself beautiful," said his mother.

A few minutes later, Mrs. Handlesman began removing the cream with a tissue.

"What's the matter?" Moishe asked. "Are you giving up?"

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