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Getting in Shape

Mr. Rosenberg, a geometry teacher at Maimonides High School started a lesson on triangles by reading a theorem. "If an angle is an exterior angle of a triangle, then its measure is greater than the measure of either of its corresponding remote interior angles."

He noticed that Chaim Yankel Rubenstein wasn't taking notes and asked him why.

"Well," Chaim Yankel replied sincerely, "I was waiting for you to start speaking English."

What to do When You’re Expecting

Rachel and Jacob Lowenthal had unfortunately been trying for a child for many years. One morning, Rachel woke up very early, took a home pregnancy test, and found out that she was expecting.

"Jacob!" she yelled to her husband, "we're going to have a baby!"

"Great," Jacob said and rolled over.

"How can you go back to sleep?" Rachel asked incredulously.

Muttering into his pillow, Jacob said, "I'm stocking up."

Sermon Says

After a particularly inspiring service at Congregation Beth Israel, one of the congregants approached Rabbi Adler. "Rabbi, that was a wonderful sermon. You should have it published."

Rabbi Adler replied, "Actually, I'm planning to have all my sermons published posthumously."

"Great!" enthused the congregant. "I can’t wait to read them!"

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