click here to jump to start of article
  • Torah Reading: Naso
Join Our Newsletter

Get latest articles and videos with Jewish inspiration and insights​

France: Reality Strikes

France: Reality Strikes

This summer I was attacked on a Paris subway car -- verbally, religiously and, yes, physically.


My life is a study of contrasts and ironies. And one of the greatest ironies is that I married a French woman.

I was raised in Portland by classic liberal parents who went out of their way to fight bigotry and hatred. Yet I can remember more than one occasion when my father -- the paragon of an ACLU-ADL Jew -- said without reservation that the French were, to be polite, at the bottom of his list of civilized people. My father, who never dwelled on the Holocaust and had no relatives who suffered at the hands of the Nazis, held an unceasing grudge against the French for their mistreatment of Jews during that terrible time.

On my first visit to Paris, I almost immediately set out by train to visit Dacha.

These almost genetically transmitted thoughts simmered within me all my life, but came to a head the moment I met my wife-to-be, 14 years ago at a bris in Bel Air. Obviously, Sara was not one of "those" French. She was Jewish and her family had emigrated from Tunisia just a few years before she was born. Her family were, and are, no more French than I am an Angeleno.

During my first visit to Europe -- just after we became engaged -- I spent a few days in Paris getting to know my new family-to-be. I made a point of not patronizing the famous Parisian museums, monuments and cafes. Instead, Sara and I almost immediately set out by train to visit Dachau and Terezienstadt. From this example of my strong-headedness, my wife speaks in equally loathing and admiring terms of my contempt for everything French (except the kosher wine).

Subway Encounter

Fast-forward to July 2005, when myself, my wife and two children (ages 9 and 6) went to visit my in-laws for their 50th anniversary. For months my wife had been admonishing me not to even dare think to appear in public without a baseball cap covering (hiding) my yarmulke. Fearing my wife more than any unknown assailant, and having been repeatedly lectured by her about not endangering our children, I alternated between ignoring her directive and reluctantly agreeing.

Now bear in mind that French Jewry is no small potatoes. Today, France has the third-largest Jewish population in the world, after America and Israel. Paris alone has 350,000 Jews. Kosher restaurants and shops abound. And while only about 15 percent of American Jews consider themselves religiously observant, nearly 50 percent of French Jews consider themselves so.

Yet still, I was repeatedly told by friends-in-the-know that even the Chief Rabbi of France, Joseph Sitruk, had decreed that French Jews are not to appear in public with their kipa showing, saying: "I do not want young people traveling alone on trains or the Metro to become easy targets for attackers."

On our first full day in Paris, on the way to a bus that would take us to meet a sister-in-law in front of the Louvre, Sara pulled a Portland Trailblazer's cap from her backpack and commanded me to don it, having already put a cap on our son, Yehuda. I put it on with the enthusiasm of a condemned man instructed to swallow cyanide.

But then, about 10 minutes into our ride, blending in as merely the second most reviled object of French scorn -- the ugly American -- I saw three handsome young Jewish men walking down the sidewalk in white shirts, black pants, and velvet kipas. I turned to my wife, handed her the cap, and told her that if those boys had the courage to walk like proud Jews with their heads held high in a city that once provided gratuitous accommodations to Adolf Hitler, who was I -- an American and an Israeli -- to cower under the pressure? Sara bit her tongue and slowly shoved the cap into her backpack.

I have never shaken the picture of Hitler standing atop the Arc de Triomphe, waving at the gleeful Parisians.

Two days into the trip we found ourselves in a subway under the heart of Paris on our way to the Champs Elysees, the same welcoming boulevard that accepted thousands of victorious goose-stepping Nazis after they strolled unmolested into France in June 1940. Same street, same country. On the many occasions that I have met friends and family at the Haagen-Dazs on that central thoroughfare, I have never shaken the picture of the Fuhrer standing atop the Arc de Triomphe, waving at the gleeful Parisians.

We -- Sara, children and my mother-in-law -- had traveled about four stops on the Metro, with six stations to go. My daughter Batya and I sat on the side closest to the door with our backs against it, one set of seats from the door. Yehuda and Sara were on the other side of the aisle, and my mother-in-law was across from and facing them. I was, of course, wearing my yarmulke, sans cap.

A non-Arab, 30-ish Frenchman entered the train. He had bushy hair down past his shoulders and glasses so thick that he could have been declared sight-impaired. I would not have noticed him, being engrossed in a conversation about math with Batya, had he not started yelling the moment he boarded. I glanced up quickly, understanding virtually nothing he was saying, and tried to distract Batya with the question of how many seconds there are between subway stops if the subway stops at four stations every five minutes. For a few stops the man continued to yell and I paid no attention to him. Batya, bless her heart, was caught up in contemplating the answer to the subway question.

Eventually the screamer noticed that we were speaking English. For the next minute or so everyone endured a barrage of cursing that would have made Eddie Murphy cringe. The voice got louder, and I heard something to the effect of, "Do not ignore me." I was then struck from behind on the side of my head, apparently a downward swipe.

I immediately jumped up and spun around. Moving forward toward the man, with at least five feet and a half-dozen passengers between us, I leaned in and inquired in a booming voice, which even frightened my children, whether he really wanted a piece of me. In that split second, I visualized taking revenge with my fist -- glasses shattered, mouth silenced. I convinced myself in that moment that this would not be much of a contest and it was the right thing to do.

My wife and mother-in-law, however, had quite the opposite opinion of what was going to happen. Sara quickly imposed herself in front of me and got into some sort of terse dialogue with the man, who never understood that she was my wife. All he wanted to know was why she would come to the defense of a Jew and an American. At the same time, even more impressively, my 70-something mother-in-law, who has had her share of health issues over the years, secured both her hands around my right bicep and yanked me off the train with the strength of a stallion. Before I could inquire for the third time, "Do you really want to mess with me?" I found myself off the train with Batya. Mother-in-law, son, and wife remained on the ride from hell.

As the train pulled away, I glared at my attacker, who was just as interested in leering back at me, his face practically pressed against the glass of the door. Then, as in some too-fake-to-be-believed movie, he grinned and brandished in front of his face a metal object. I don't know if it was a knife or a cross, but I do know that it's entirely possible that my Kung Fu theory was faulty and my mother-in-law had just saved my life.

Batya and I caught our breath and sat down to wait for the next train. She was not sure what had transpired, but she was very afraid for me. After I comforted her, two French high school boys approached us. They had been on the train with us and had disembarked with us. After huddling for a few moments, one of them in broken English shyly apologized for the incident. Speaking for his friend and himself (and all of France, he believed), the boy tried to assure me the attacker was not representative of all Frenchmen. Seeing that they were more embarrassed and shaken than I was, it did not seem the time to challenge his assertion by citing the general French population's enthusiastic participation in such hijinks as the Dreyfus Affair, French Nazi collaboration, and the current drive to appease France's 5 million Muslims with unceasing pro-Palestinian policies. Instead, I nodded graciously.

The attacker was yelling, "Kill you, kill you, kill you" as we got off.

A minute later we were on the next train. I assured Batya that the other three family members would be waiting for us at the next stop. Sure enough, with great relief, all our eyes met as the train pulled up to the next platform. I asked Sara why they did not get off the train when I did, and she said it was too crowded from her side of the train. I also think that she wanted to give the guy a piece of her mind, which I learned later, she did, and then some.

I was then debriefed about the man's diatribe. My wife later informed me that from the moment he got on the train he was screaming directly at me about Ariel Sharon and Israeli policies. For five minutes we were all treated to a classic French barrage of anti-Israel, anti-Semitic, and eventually anti-American drivel. Batya added that attacker was yelling, "Kill you, kill you, kill you" as we got off. I must have missed that.

Before reaching our stop (a station so ironically named that you would think I concocted it for this chronicle -- the "Franklin D. Roosevelt" station), my wife jammed the cap in my face and commanded me to wear it. I informed her as gently as possible that the last thing I was going to do as an Israeli and American, after being attacked as a Jew and American, was to hide my yarmulke. She knew better than to fight; she knew whom she had married.

Return to Zion

We all spent the rest of the day replaying the attack. My wife's family's basic reaction was that I was a fool for going out without a disguising cap. The only exception was one of my father-in-law's sisters, who, when she saw me again refuse to put on a cap, praised me for my "convictions."

I watch my in-laws, who saw their Tunisian city and homes blown to bits during World War II, and who uprooted their family to start over in France, emotionally torn apart by the notion of emigrating. They know it is the right thing to do, as exemplified by their oldest granddaughter, Carole, who is making aliyah this summer. But they toil with the quandary of what to do with five other grandchildren and a host of their own siblings who depend upon them in France. Their shame over what happened to me in the subway was far more painful than anything I felt. Yet they feel they cannot leave.

Last year, Ariel Sharon declared, "If I have to advise our brothers in France, I'll tell them one thing -- move to Israel, as early as possible. I say that to Jews all around the world, but there, I think it's a must and they have to move immediately."

French politicians and Jewish community leaders dismissed Sharon's remarks as "inadmissible and unacceptable." Yet this year, 3,300 of France's 600,000 Jews will make aliyah -- tenfold the percentage of American Jews making aliyah this year.

There are some strange and dangerous energies pulsing through the world these days. And Jews, it seems, always catch the brunt of it. Ideally, our return to Zion will not be on the back of terror or persecution. And hopefully, those who need some encouragement to come home will not have to be pushed over the edge by a blow to the head.

The unabridged version of this article originally appeared on

August 13, 2005

Give Tzedakah! Help create inspiring
articles, videos and blogs featuring timeless Jewish wisdom.
The opinions expressed in the comment section are the personal views of the commenters. Comments are moderated, so please keep it civil.

Visitor Comments: 30

(29) Anonymous, January 20, 2015 6:00 PM

Clarifications needed

The traumatic experience of being assaulted in the Paris subway, which happened to me many years ago, might have happened to you regardless of age, gender, attire, or religious affiliation. The subway lacks policing and there are crazy people lurking down there. If they are bigoted too it's even worse. Do not use the subway there.
As for the Dreyfus case, as is clear from the history books, "those" French at the time were about evenly in his favor or against him. One, the writer Emile Zola, was in fact instrumental in Dreyfus's eventual exoneration and return to his career. Remember "J'accuse"?
It is inaccurate to say that France welcomed the Nazis. It was militarily defeated because of its inept high command but thousands of French troops died fighting anyway. By the way,
if it was not for Pearl Harbor later would the US have entered the war?
During the Nazi parade after their 1940 victory. Paris was largely deserted and in mourning and nobody cheered Hitler -- and the Arch of Triumph is too high for any crowd on the ground to see or hear whoever is at the top.
Collaboration during the war was a shameful reality and should be acknowledged as such. Chirac as president did so. Fortunately, we'll never know what collaboration might have been in some allied countries with pro-fascist elements, had they too been defeated and occupied.

(28) Susan Jacobson, October 27, 2005 12:00 AM

Daughter of a Survivor, Boxcars in Paris & Akham's Razor

I always pray silently when I ride the subway. I pray for strangers. I pray that they are peaceful and that Hashem brings peace to all those riding. I pray to Hashem that I survive the journey. I pray, I meditate on Tikkun Olam, because really once the doors close your life is in the hands of the all mighty. Riding public transportation, in any major city worldwide is dangerous.

Mr. Brownstein, I live in the beautiful wide open of spaces of Oregon now and I read your article with great interest. You come from Porltand , Oregon a large west coast city in the USA where people are killed everyday because of racism.

The Metro in Paris smells like vomit, urine and garbage. To my father, a Holocaust survivor, the subway cars reminded him of the boxcars. As a daughter of a Holocaust Survivor, I feel my father’s view of public transportation was not too far off. I really do think of riding in a subway car is much like riding in a cattle boxcar. In the USA, New York comes to ming, you have to be careful and certainly San Francisco's Muni Transit System can be a torture chamber. I try to avoid riding public transportation, but if I have to do it, I move into survival mode. Survive the ride safely and unharmed is my goal. The unspoken contract is always in place when you ride public transportation: ride at your own risk.

It made me sad that you experienced the rage of such a terrible person in the Paris Metro. I wonder if this rage was really all directed towards you as a Jew or was the violence directed towards you, just because you were there. I believe that anyone who had the bad luck of standing near this person on the Metro in Paris, would have received this violence, any excuse would have sufficed. If you had been a woman, this same sort of violent person would have made rude comments or touched you inappropriately to get a negative response. The violent damaged man wanted to act out violently. The concept of Akham's Razor suggests that all things being equal, the simplest answer is usually the correct one.

I can see the correlation you make between the troubled past of France during Nazi Occupation, but I think riding the subway is a modern violent mechanized journey that can be related to the Holocaust in only the most literal way.

Paris is very much like any other big city. I feel that in the USA our transit systems are even more dangerous.

In San Francisco, for instance, riders are packed in like cattle during rush hour. Drivers stand outside the cars speaking loudly, "keep moving, keep moving". People have even been killed by being caught in the closing doors or murdered during their ride.

As a commuter, you stand shoulder to shoulder in full body contact with strangers as you try to get home~ because you need to get home and not wait 2 hours for an empty train to arrive. If you have one crazy person or one person who barfs everywhere on you or is sick or coughing and sneezing all over you ~ it is extremely uncomfortable. I can see why my father who was a Holocaust Survivor would never ride the subway.

I feel bad that you experienced this, but everyone who rides public transit in big cities, knows of the potential violence. Your safety is not assured by paying the price of your ticket. Trapped in the cars, packed in, the underground public transit system feels like a form of prison or torture. I always think of my father and his experiences when I have to ride the subway.

My father used to say that in the camps your conscience demanded that you should always risk your life for your fellow Jews but since you were trapped in a prison, you had to choose your fights wisely. I want to pass on my father’s advice to you and caution you to choose your fights wisely. Your life is not worth the words from a crazy man on the Metro.

I have spent the last 10 years documenting and researching which camps that my father survived. I like living in more rural Oregon now , but during the summer of 2004 I spent 35 days out of the country to do Holocaust related research. I visited Buchenwald and attended a conference in Riga, Latvia for 10 days. I got to visit the mass grave Rumbula where my grandparents were buried and then spent time at Buchewald Concentration Camp in Germany where my father was a prisoner.

I ended my trip in Paris. A week in Paris was a great respite from spending so much time in Germany.We stayed with our friend who is a photographer and lived in Paris for eight years. I have to say I felt extremely safe as a Jew in Paris.

Tikkun Olam, we pray to repair the violence in the world. Remembering the lessons of the Holocaust in order to re~victimize ourselves is dangerous habit. I ask you to please consider the concept of Akham's Razor which suggests that all things being equal, the simplest answer is usually the correct one.

As you process the painful violence you experienced, consider that perhaps you experienced violence on the Paris Metro because you had the bad luck to stand near someone who was a violent man with a sick spirit.

(27) Anonymous, September 24, 2005 12:00 AM

Unfair generalizations

I agree that the situation in France these days is quite sensitive. If you are going to hate the French because they welcomed A H into Paris, why not hate the Lithuanians, Polish, Latvians etc? They welcomed the Nazis in and were even more enthusiastic than the French and quite a lot of Europe really. In Spain for instance, I see cathedrals built over synagogues and the pain of all the Jews who were forced out, converted or burnt. I don't think the good old US of A is free of anti-Semitism either. There are many, many people who don't show their face like they do in France and keep their anti-Semitism covert. Much of American society is open but quite a lot of it isn't and when you move away from cities, you would be shocked with what you find.

(26) raquel, August 20, 2005 12:00 AM

French are human beings

To say french are antisemitic is a full of prejudice phrase, equal to "all Jews are...".
French are human beings. some are antisemitic, many not. some hate the arabs and muslims, and attack them fiecely. I am strongly against attacking any human being.
A country that is the home of the 3rd jewish community in the world, it is too light a thought to think of it grossly as antisemitic as a whole.
Strangely just the same happens with Argentina, its strong jewish population, and the thoughjt outside that it is and antisemitic place to live...

(25) Alberto Meguira, August 19, 2005 12:00 AM

French Government needs to know

Thanks so much for this article. I agree with Mr Brownstein. I am going to forward it to the French interior minister.

See All Comments

Submit Your Comment:

  • Display my name?

  • Your email address is kept private. Our editor needs it in case we have a question about your comment.

  • * required field 2000
Submit Comment