For kids, Passover is one of the highlights of the Jewish year. For parents, it is one of the greatest opportunities of the year. It is such a busy time -- cleaning the house, cooking the food, preparing for guests, reading up about the holiday, etc. It can also be an extremely emotional time, with family feelings rising to the fore, and a spiritual time, with the themes of freedom and redemption entering our daily lives.

How can we take advantage of this incredible opportunity to create lasting Jewish memories for our children?

I have divided my suggestions and ideas into three areas: goals, attitudes, and activities:

Goals

As adults, our goals may include learning something new, continuing family traditions, connecting more deeply to Jewish meaning, or, for many, simply surviving! Aside from these, what is your 'Jewish parenting' goal for the Passover Seders? What do you want your children to gain?

The way I see it, the primary goals for our younger children are (a) to give them an exciting and fun Jewish experience, (b) to teach them the basics of the Passover story, and (c) to develop their appreciation of the value of freedom.

For older kids, our primary goals are (a) to include them in meaningful discussions they can relate to, (b) to give them the feeling of being an important part of the Jewish people and (c) to reinforce favorite family traditions that make the Seder memorable for everyone.

I encourage you to make your own short list of goals. The important thing is to plan realistic goals in advance so you can manage the Seder confidently and with focus.

Attitudes

Whether Passover will seem to your kids as a highlight of the year to look forward to or another Jewish ritual they have to uphold will depend on the attitudes they see in you.

Think about the time leading up to Passover last year. What attitude towards the upcoming holiday do you think your children saw in you? Kids may or may not absorb the things we tell them, but they always sense our attitudes. Whether Passover will seem to your kids as a highlight of the year to look forward to or another Jewish ritual they have to uphold will depend on the attitudes they see in you. Make sure your children pick up messages of excitement, anticipation and Jewish pride rather than harried obligation, stress and anxiety. While it is important that the Passover cleaning is done properly, it is also important that the pre-holiday feeling in your home is one your children will want one day for their own homes. When things get hectic in the pre-Passover rush, it is important that children don't get yelled at ("Get back here with that bagel!").

How to best clean the house and get all the cooking done on time? The subject is beyond the scope of this article (and beyond most mere mortals), but avoiding the temptation to procrastinate can keep the stress down (so can a glass of wine or two, by the way). Also watch out for other causes of stress at holiday times such as high expectations, new clothes the kids have to keep clean and the recurring "challenges" visiting in-laws thoughtfully provide for the benefit of our personal growth.

During the year, Jewish life is often about making sacrifices, terrorism in Israel and community obligations. But not on Passover. This is the night that God Himself took us out of slavery and professed his love for us. This is a night we are all kings -- a night of hope and redemption, a night of appreciation and trust. If you can project these attitudes (even a little bit!), they will filter through to your children.

Activities

The enemy of Passover is passivity. The Rabbis who compiled the Haggadah purposely got the children involved, and so should we. Instead of one person reading the Haggadah while everyone else sits silently the entire evening, everyone should participate and enjoy.

How can we do this?