Consistently happy people are either in one of two conditions. Either no one has ever wronged or slighted them in any way. Or else they have forgiven those who have. Since it is almost impossible not to have been wronged or slighted, if you want to master happiness, you need to learn how to forgive.
Forgiving is like floating on water. You don't need to do anything. You just need to let go. When you were a young child of five or six, you became angry at your brothers, sisters, friends, and classmates. You might have even said, "I won't forgive you." Now when you look back at the vast majority of those situations, you will see that they were trivial. It is at present easy for you to forgive someone for not giving you a bite of their ice cream, not letting you play with their toys, or grabbing your ice cream or toys. Just as you have already forgiven them, you will be able to forgive others for more recent events when you realize that most things are trivial when compared to your emotional and spiritual well-being.
We all need our Creator's forgiveness. By forgiving others we elevate ourselves and render ourselves more worthy of being forgiven. When you find it difficult to forgive, pray with your own words for the strength to forgive
(From Rabbi Pliskin's "Happiness",p.171)
Rabbi Zelig Pliskin's new book has just been published by Artscroll:


(2) cari white, August 28, 2009 4:40 PM
forgiveness
What happens when you are forgiven by a friend and gladly receive it, but when you extend forgiveness that person denies being in need of it...because they didnt do anything to you. What do you do then?
(1) mysteries, August 1, 2009 8:59 PM
Forgiving in front
To forgive in front of somebody who one feels has wronged them is best avoided. This can seem condescending to the other person who may feel that they have done no wrong. Better is to make an affirmation in private to lighten the load upon oneself to forgive the other person for the debt of pain that they have inflicted on oneself signified by the upset and angry emotions. That acts to clear the debt of the other person to oneself as regards the option to forgive that one possess but still the other part of the act of forgiveness has to be performed by other powers not comprising of the parties involved namely the debtor and creditor. This process carries on even with repeated infringements without a resolution. It is better for your health to forgive and at least one has discharged their responsibility. One has the power to move on and close the situation.