Imagine two people who are very different from each other. This needn't be a source of conflict. Rather, if each one focuses on how to help the other, then the differences between them will actually make their personalities complementary.
Not only will they like each other despite their differences, but rather, because of them. They will even become closer, because their differences provide more opportunities to be of service to each other.
Contrast this to those who focus on what he can take from the other. They will quarrel frequently and eventually end up hating one another.
(see Rabbi Eliyahu Eliezer Dessler - Michtav MaiEliyahu, vol.3,
pp.33-4; Rabbi Pliskin's "Consulting the Wise")
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Rabbi Zelig Pliskin's new book has just been published by Artscroll:
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About the Author
More by this Author >
Rabbi Zelig Pliskin is a noted psychologist and prolific author of 24 books, including Guard Your Tongue, Gateway to Happiness, Gateway to Self Knowledge, Love Your Neighbor, Growth Through Torah, The Power of Words, Consulting the Wise, and the recent Life is Now. Rabbi Pliskin lives in Jerusalem, and is the director of Aish HaTorah's Counseling Center and a senior lecturer at Aish's Essentials program and the Executive Learning Center. He was ordained at the Telshe Yeshiva in Ohio and holds a degree in Counseling Psychology.
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(1) Joey, October 18, 2009 7:36 AM
Folklore
This reminds me of an old story about a blind man and a crippled man who both wanted to find a magic healing stream. Neither could get to it on their own, so they came up with a clever solution---the blind man carried the crippled man on his shoulders, and the crippled man used his sight to tell the blind man where to walk. XD God bless!