click here to jump to start of article
Join Our Newsletter

Join 400,000 Aish subscribers
Get Email Updates




Daily Lift #213

What Do You Say to Yourself After Someone Criticizes You?

Imagine that someone criticizes you. Then imagine yourself feeling joyful about this wonderful opportunity to learn something positive from the criticism. Imagine that you love to hear feedback about what you’ve said and done or didn’t say and do. Positive feedback means that you are on track. Critical feedback means that you can now improve and develop yourself.

Imagine that your self-talk sounds like, "I appreciate and am grateful for this wonderful opportunity to become better. I am grateful to this person for telling me something that will be beneficial for me."

If you actually respond to criticism this way, congratulations! It shows that you have integrated one of the elevated qualities listed in the 48 factors to acquire Torah.

If you are like most people, however, you don’t think of critical feedback as one of your greatest pleasures in life. But if you have the inner strength, courage, and honesty to be open to hearing criticism, you will grow more in life.

So what can you say to yourself if you have not yet mastered the ability to love criticism?

One possibility is: "My goal is to constantly grow and develop myself. I love positive feedback. But I can grow from critical feedback. So I will increase my inner strength, courage, and honesty to be open to hear what people say, and to weigh what they say objectively."

You don’t have to feel bad about yourself because someone gave you critical feedback. Your value as a person is inherent, because you are a child of the Creator and are created in His image. You have many positive qualities and have done many positive things. Your value and worth are infinite. Integrating this attitude will ensure that your sense of self-worth will remain consistently high.

(from Rabbi Zelig Pliskin's book: "Conversations With Yourself", pp.174-5) [Artscroll.com])

See more Daily Lifts on the topic of Criticism

NEW BOOK!

Rabbi Zelig Pliskin's new book has just been published by Artscroll: SELF-CONFIDENCE: Formulas, Stories, and Insights.

Self-confidence allows you to create goals -- and reach them. It lets you learn from your failures -- and move on to triumphs. It helps you transform your potential into real achievement. With the help of Rabbi Zelig Pliskin, you will gain that self-confidence.

Rabbi Zelig Pliskin is the author of 25 books with his specialty in mastering happiness and other positive inner resources.

His last 15 books include: "Taking Action", "Happiness", "Kindness", "Courage", "Serenity", "Building Your Self-image" "Conversations with Yourself" and "Marriage." These books are available at: Artscroll.com.

Give Tzedakah! Help Aish.com create inspiring
articles, videos and blogs featuring timeless Jewish wisdom.

Submit Your Comment:

  • Display my name?

  • Your email address is kept private. Our editor needs it in case we have a question about your comment.


  • * required field 2000
Submit Comment
stub
Sign up today!