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Daily Lift #233

King Solomon's Wise Formula

In the book of Proverbs (27:19), we find an amazing formula for peace. "As in water, face is to face, so too is the heart of one person to another."

When you look at your reflection in a pond or in a mirror, you will see the exact same expression that is on your face. If you frown and scowl, you will see a frown and scowl staring right back at you. And if you smile and wave, you will see a smile and a wave. This is a natural law of physics. To frown and expect to see a smile on the image of your face in a mirror isn't a wise expectation.

King Solomon teaches us that this natural law has a counterpoint in the laws of human nature. The inner feelings you experience towards someone will be reflected back to you from the heart of that person.

See the good in other people. See them as being souls who have high aspirations even if at present they are not yet using all of their potential. See people as they will be when they are at their best. Judge people favorably. See the positive intentions of what they say and do even when it would be preferable if they chose better ways to accomplish those positive intentions.

The way to influence people to feel better towards you is to radiate unconditional love and respect towards them. When someone likes and respects you first, it's easier to reciprocate those feelings. It is a step towards greatness to be the one to create unconditional love and respect when you need to sustain this in the face of challenges. Be willing to take this step.

(from Rabbi Zelig Pliskin's book: Harmony with Others, pp.32-3,

See more Daily Lifts on the topic of Dealing with others


Rabbi Zelig Pliskin's new book has just been published by ArtScroll: ENCOURAGEMENT: Formulas, Stories, and Insights.

We're human. We need food. We need meaning and connection. And we most definitely need encouragement.

Now, in this wise and charming new volume, we learn how to effectively use the massive power of encouragement, to encourage ourselves and others, particularly when we feel overwhelmed or depleted.

In Encouragement, Rabbi Pliskin shares meditations and affirmations, inspirational true stories, and his trademark wise, practical advice. He shows us how our words can help others - and ourselves -- become more confident, optimistic, and upbeat people.

Rabbi Zelig Pliskin is the author of 25 books with his specialty in mastering happiness and other positive inner resources.

His last 15 books include such titles as: "Taking Action", "Happiness", "Kindness", "Courage", "Serenity", "Building Your Self-image" "Conversations with Yourself" and "Marriage." These books are available at:

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Visitor Comments: 1

(1) Ben, January 14, 2010 12:18 AM

I used to believe this...

Not to be a negative nelly, but I used to love this quote but now I am finding it more difficult to buy into. Too often I smile and greet others excitedly but do not get a similar response. Often times I feel bad after that only a fraction of people respond positively to this. I read many books on it and spoken to many but I have not found a clear proof to this idea. It sounds nice though but it is not even close to reality (yet)


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