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Daily Lift #371

Your Attitude Toward Insults

Some people mistakenly say, "He hurt my feelings," or "He made me feel bad." But in actuality, no one can hurt your feelings or make you feel bad -- unless you allow their words to affect you. Your attitude toward an insult causes you pain, not the insult itself.

The emotional pain of an insult comes from what you add to it.

(Rabbi Pliskin's "Gateway to Happiness," p.294)

See more Daily Lifts on the topic of Insults


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Visitor Comments: 1

(1) Rabbi Alan Betsalel Friedlander, June 9, 2015 10:50 PM

Avoiding Verbal Abuse

This is a good lesson, but it needs context. It could be misused by those who seek victims and those who are prone to make themselves a victim. "only I'm to blame for my pain not the person who is insulting me" can empower perpetual verbal abuse. It's a balance between knowing one has the ability to limit the pain and between preventing verbal abuse. To encourage abuse would be a violation of "lo sitain michshol, do not place a stumbling block." (Lev. 19:14)

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