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Daily Lift #859

Respond To Arguments With Honest Humility

Respond to the outbursts of others with humility. Agree with any truth you see in their statement. By agreeing with part of the person's comments, you are likely to calm him down. ("Yes, I was inconsiderate." "I agree with you that I can improve." "That was a stupid thing I did.")

Conversely, when you try to defend yourself, an angry person will usually keep up his attack. Arguing with him adds fuel to the fire. When you agree with him, however, he will see that he has no reason to keep arguing since you already agree with him. Some people find this difficult to do, but try this a few times, and you will see that it works wonders.

(Rabbi Pliskin's Gateway to Happiness, p.204)

See more Daily Lifts on the topic of Arguments

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Visitor Comments: 1

(1) Dvirah, May 5, 2010 3:46 PM

Agreeing

I've always felt obliged to acknowledge any grain of truth in an opponent's argument, even if I was demonstrably 99.99% correct and the opponent only 0.01% correct. However, as in most cases my opponent is NOT willing to see any of the truth in my argument no matter what, this policy means that I don't win very many arguments. In the best cases, we can agree to disagree.

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