There is a very powerful tool that will enable you to overcome many potential quarrels. This is the art of knowing how to act with "strategic humility" when a needless quarrel might arise. By being willing to forego illusory honor and speaking to someone from a humble position, you will be able to soften a heart made of stone. Your opponent's heart will melt in the face of your warmth when you act in a humble manner.
Even if you think you are losing by acting humbly, actually you lose absolutely nothing in a spiritual sense. Outwardly you are complying with the wishes of another person, but inwardly your spiritual level is not affected.
(see Rabbi Chaim Zaitchyk - Maayanai Hachaim, vol.3, 64-5; Rabbi Pliskin's "Consulting the Wise")
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