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Don't Call Home!
What happened to sending away your kids to camp?
Published:
July 5, 2009
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Visitor Comments: 12
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About the Author
Mrs. Lori Palatnik
Lori Palatnik is a writer and Jewish educator who has appeared on television and radio, and is the author of "Friday Night and Beyond: The Shabbat Experience Step-By-Step," "Remember My Soul - What to do in Memory of a Loved One," and co-author of "Gossip: 10 Pathways to Eliminate It From Your Life and Transform Your Soul." She is a much sought-after international speaker, having lectured in the U.S., Canada, Mexico, U.K., Central America, South America, South Africa and Israel, including featured talks at Yale, Brown and Penn. She lives in the Washington D.C. area, with her husband, Rabbi Yaakov Palatnik. Lori is the Founder of The Jewish Women's Renaissance Project, an international initiative that brings over 1,000 women to Israel each year from ten different countries on highly subsidized programs to inspire them with the beauty and wisdom of their heritage. She is the busy mother of five children, ages 24 to 14; and her son, Zev, just finished serving as a sharpshooter in the IDF. Her weekly video blog, "Lori Almost Live" is a popular feature on aish.com, viewed by over 50,000 people each month.
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(12) SusanE, July 11, 2009 3:49 PM
What Happened to Taking Your Kids on Outings?
Many children especially the ones whose parents can afford it go to summer camp. Most kids have a great time and it is an enviroment that enriches their otherwise not so stimulating summer.
II've always been of the thought if you want your kid to go canoeing, take him and his friends canoeing for the day. Want him to sleep in a tent, then buy a tent and invite his friends to a nearby park. If it's computers he's into go with him to computer day classes, or sign up a friend or two. Pick a place a week in driving distance, caves, railroads, evening auto races, small town festivals, county fairs, heritage events or sports lessons. There are hundreds of things to pick from to do with your children over the summer months.. As you can see I'm not big on summer camps.
School months are regimented for children but summer is so free and is the best time to spend with your kids doing things they truly enjoy doing with you. No homework no worries, no scheduling. They need free time to explore.
Any child that is away from their parents without 24 hour access is a child in trouble. This is disturbing on so many levels. Any camp that doesn't allow 24 hour access should be crossed off your list. When a child calls home with a vague excuse about any matter, go immediately and get him or her. Children won't tell you what is wrong. At the least they are uncomfortable and need to be with you. In the extreme they have already been hurt. They need to be safe. The question today was "What happened to sending away your kids to camp? " Don't Call Home. If a boss or a friend or your husband or your mother called 2 times a day, most people would take the call. Why shouldn't our kids be given that access too? If this same child can stay at a friends home overnight or go vacationing for a few days with friends, but is calling from camp, it is a sign that all is not right. If he can't stay away on overnights, then he certainly should not be sent to camp..
(11) Avraham G., July 9, 2009 6:16 PM
Don't have them stop calling, just be frim with your own boundaries.
Kids are not talking to their parents enough these days and that is why they are going off the derech because there is not enough emotional connection. If we want our kids to be independent then be strong enough to tell them when they call you demanding you send a wardrobe to them in camp that the answer is "no." But don't have them stop calling.
(10) fred, July 9, 2009 7:11 AM
One Reason
Airfare from California camp tuition on top of already beginning to pay next year's yeshiva tuition.
(9) Anonymous, July 9, 2009 1:49 AM
They can't call me, they can't email me, and they don't even write!
Thanks. You have given me new appreciation for my childrens' camps, where I can email them, but they can't email me back; I only hear from them if they are in the infirmary, and frankly, they are too busy to write. I miss them, but they work hard all year and deserve a break from me!
(8) Anonymous, July 8, 2009 10:08 PM
To Anonymous: sometimes camp is better than home
If what you suggest is true (and, by the way, I don't think it is) -that American parents want their kids elsewhere for selfish reasons- then perhaps camp is preferable. As a kid, I learned more about my skills, my interests, my capacity for self-reliance, in 8 weeks at camp every summer than I did in the other 10 months at home every year. I also felt more loved and valued. What is definitely different between America and Israel is that in Israel all adults take an interest in all kids. Children have many examples of responsibility, humor, creativity, parenting, faith, and work -examples both attractive and unattractive- to assess and perhaps emulate. In America, except for teachers, the only significant adult models are parents - and no one parent can show a child as many options as dozens of neighbors and even strangers. In Israel, children may learn something positive about themselves in a single bus ride or walk to the makolet. In America, anyone who addresses someone else's child risks the wrath of the parent. It's my opinion that sleepaway camp is more necessary to the development of many (not all) American kids than it is to the development of most (not all) Israeli kids. And it is also my view that all kids benefit from seeing themselves as the maximum number of "others" see them.