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Marriage in Crisis

Don't ignore the warning signs. Get the help you need.

Published: May 1, 2010


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Visitor Comments: 16

(16) Anonymous, May 10, 2010 11:37 PM

sometimes crisis is what we want

First, I want to make a point that I am not talking about children. When there are warning signs that we ignore, often it means that we are ourselves ambivalent about marriage or another relationship and we let the crisis happen. I truly believe that if we know what we want and we want to save the relationship, we will not let it crumble. Sometimes letting things happen this way are the way we say we don't want to work on that relationship. I bet that woman Lori described refused to be intimate with her husband because she did not want to be his wife (maybe not fully conscious). But she did not want sexual intimacy, emotional intimacy, etc.

(15) Anonymous, May 7, 2010 1:31 AM

Maybe try a therapist?they'l love to give advice and talk

(14) Anonymous, May 7, 2010 12:47 AM

What about the intermarriage problems?

There is a lot of issues that comes up when you have intermarried. Some couples seem to make it work, but mine didn't. I had married a catholic, and we had so many different conflicts. How can you talk out those kinds of issues between the two? Our marriage was annulled last year through the church tribunal. Another nasty process to go through, when I was the outsider. I'm glad I didn't spend the rest of my life in that marriage. I read the other comments, and if there isn't any hope in your marriage; get out, you deserve to be happy. A marriage partner is suppose to bring the best out of us, not the worse. Where two is better than one. If not, it's better to be one. I went to talk to an excellent couselor before my divorce. He didn't say a word, he just let me talk. By speaking it out to someone else, I knew the answer. When we keep all of that inside our heads, it's so hard to sort it out. It's best when it's not family or someone you know. When your face to face with a counselor, and your spilling your heart out; and you hear yourself speaking it, it helps. You will know what you need to do, then just do it. #8, that isn't a marriage. He is robbing you of having children and intimacy and happiness. When in a "not going anywhere marriage", most people will try to talk you into staying in the marriage; when you really want someone to tell you "it's o.k. to leave." "G-d does forgive divorce!!"

(13) Anonymous, May 6, 2010 5:04 PM

Some marriages not intended to last

I got married right after high school. We only dated a couple of month. He was in my class, so I did know of him. After two weeks of marriage, I realized I made a huge mistake. He realized it in 6 weeks. We stayed together for several years, till we both realized this just wasn't going to work for the long haul. Life is to long to live like that. We tried to correct our mistake by staying together. I learned many things in that marriage, good and bad. But when you have made a mistake, no matter how hard it is to confess up to that, putting the ego aside, eventually I had to face that reality by getting a divorce. Something I never in my life before getting married ever considered to be an option. In my case, the crisis was on the wedding day, and no amount of counceling can correct a mistake.

(12) Anonymous, May 6, 2010 1:24 AM

I agree with Ellie (#7): I have no idea who to turn to, someone objective who I am not afraid of burdening and who I trust to give me good advice. Help!

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