Bageling

This reminds me of an experience about 30 years ago. I had had a difficult driving to Pittsburgh on the Pa. Turnpike due to car problems. After visiting my daughter, I was returning to NJ when I panicked before the tunnels. I could not drive through them. It was a Sunday, 4th of July. There must have been hundreds of people at the rest stop. I approached one one family whose men were wearing kippot. and explained my problem. A woman said she would drive me through the tunnels and meet her family at the rest stop after the tunnels. While driving we spoke and realized we had been at the same shul on Shabbat when my son-in-law had read Torah.. I will never forget her kindness.

Back in 1970, when I returned from military training, my friends had a picnic for me and a young lady was one of the guests. Neither of us were quick to make the first move to break the ice, and then it happened - she made a reference to liking (insert a brand name of obvious Jewish origin) rye bread the best, and the rest is history... almost 37 years of marriage! All because of a little rye bread "bageling!"

New Yorkers schlep, have chutzpah, wish their neighbors "Gut Shabos" whether they are Jewish or not. Bageliing is the NY language. As the comedian Lenny Bruce said, "New Yorkers are Jewish even if they are goyish."

I think I missed an opportunity yesterday to bagel. I was sitting in the expansive offices of not just the eye doctor but dermatology and a woman sat down. She look slightly Hispanic and I thought, she's really beautiful. Then I saw her purse, and it was a sling purse with Hebrew letters that spelled SHALOM and there was a dove on that purse. I couldn't take my eyes off it. It was, so beautiful, and I surmised she's Jewish! I wish I had broken my shyness to talk to her, and especially to admire that very wonderful purse.

How come it's called bageling? Because we run rings around each other? Or maybe because we are such a hole-y people? And then where does the lox fit into all this, as in: if you are ever stuck in LOX airport, you can just bagel and then salmon-one Jewish will come to smoke you out? This is WAY too much fun... thanks for dishing!

I AM FROM ISRAEL AND I FEEL THAT IN OTHER COUNTRIES WHEN I VISIT AND SOMEBODY IS CLEARLY JEWISH OR AN ISRAELY-IT IS SO TRUE -IT WOULD MAKE ME HAPPY IF YOU CAME TO SPEAK AT "ETAI"-OUR ENGLISH TEACHERS CONVENTION HELD IN JERUSALEM- TODA RABA FROM HAGIT

. It is a nice exchange when someone says something so that they can connect, it's nice to respond in kind and with a warm smile. Thank G-d there are still bagelers but the one word, one line connection, what do they do next. What do we do next to encourage a next step. Bageling happened to me and I got so excited and I followed up with a short conversation that resulted in doing a mitzvah for the person, so maybe the person's next step will be more active than expressive. His part of the tribe will be more participatory, the person will grow from bageling. Today is Tisha b'av, we need mitzvohs, we need to connect and reach out in return.

If you live in NYC, everyone is Jewish...or if you live here long enough, you'll pick up on certain "shibboleths" and use them without knowing why, e.g. my anthropology professor from Minnesota named "Twig Johnson" who used the word "nosh" during a lecture. (His pronunciation was very Minnesotan...more like "nawsh" than "nahsh.") My mom used to use the word "lansman." If someone was Jewish, they'd pick up on it. If not, the other party would let it pass. In my experience, I've had someone come up to me at work (in a rather gentile neighborhood) who said "I understand you're the Jewish librarian." I didn't know what to make of this, so I said "Do you mean 'Are you the librarian in charge of Judaica or you're the librarian who happens to be Jewish?'" He smiled and said "Jewish." He then revealed himself to be Jewish, too, although he kept it under wraps because his mother had told him to (and he was in his 80s!) I became his friend and confidant after that. He is now of blessed memory and I won't forget our little connection.

Hi Lori, This u-tube, bageling, really hit home. It is so true. I am also so proud of being Jewish and wherever we are, there is always a strong feeling of togetherness when you see another Jewish person. My husband and I live in Eretz Yisrael B'Hashem, so everyone around us practically, is Jewish. That is another absolute magnificence of living here. When I leave, then I really feel so grateful for every Jewish person I see. I have always felt strongly about this but have never been able to put it into words. You sure did it for me. I must tell you that I always enjoy your videos. Thank you so much! Rachel

i didn't realise it has a name but when i was still living in England, i used to go to dances where there were a lot of Jews but not everyone was. My test was if the boy i was dancing with asked me what my magen david necklace was, i realised he wasn't Jewish.

I think there may be something more in bageling. Could it be that the one making contact (the bageler?) is actually asking for something? Is s/he saying, "I'm open to a non-threatening contact with an observant Jew. Teach me something or maybe invite me." If this is true, it means that we have to react carefully and sensitively.

I would have to say that most men do not wear a necklace, but I do, and with SOOO much LOVE!!! It is with my sterling silver little Star of David that my great grandmother gave me. I was in Toronto giving a pep talk to a group of medical folks and on day 3, it waas casual and so my necklace was visable for the first time, I had 36 people come up to me and tell me Shabbbos Shalom!(It was Friday, unlike your husband Lori, tee hee)but I tell you, the feeling was so warm and 12 of us went out for a kosher meal that evening!!! It was so awesome.... So, a little Bageling, as Martha Stewart might say, "It's a GOOD thing!". Great story Lori, as usual!!!! Shalom my friend

Couldn't agree more, I love being a religious Jew and what you mention about having somewhere to go if G-d forbid something happens is a main reason. We are really a big family that looks out for one another. There is nothing like being Jewish.

there's an old joke about a man who's car broke down, so he stopped on the side of the road, put his kippa on and waited. within 30 seconds another Jew stopped to help him. they started talking and it turns out that the guy with the broken car is not Jewish, so the Jew asked him why are you wearing a kippa? so he answered: Mama always told me that if I ever get stuck, I should put this thing on my head and very quickly someone will come to help.

This article only applies to Diaspora Jews. Totally diff. for those of us who made Aliyah or were fortunate enough to have been born in the Holy Land. You don't have to "bagel" - assuming people are Jewish is the default.

I liked this "Almost Live" because it speaks to me the way bageling does. That I have been doing for a long time. I like using words that are not in mainstream when some don't even know they are Yiddish or Hebrew languages. It is this wonderful club and a belonging that is like no other. I love you humor and have to get in on the podcasts after the fact as they are archived. For some reason I can never get in on the "live" ones. Still good, though and I learn so much. Thank you. Kathy

Lori I am proud to be Jewish.I wander if part of that pride stems from the fact that we have a State of Israel.We are a people,with a Torah and a homeland.For 2000 years we were not able to say that complete sentence.We are blessed to have teachers like you who remind us in your ever so warm way that been Jewish is multifaceted,dynamic and inspirational.It is the key to the present and the answer to eternity.The joy of our souls is found in the pages of Torah,the prayers of the synagogue(or heart) and in the holiness of family purity.Hashem expects high standards from us but if we we fall,teshuva brings us right back to that Heavenly Throne.Awe of Hashem is expected but love of Hashem is commanded.

Lori, I've always wondered what the actual term was for the definition we perform every day. You got it right, we're all the same team; we're all in it together. In response to comment 1 by Anonymous, the closest Orthodox community is 4.5 hours away. The college town I live in consists of less than 7 Orthodox and Conservative Jews who travel 1 hour to get to the conservative synagogue (which is the closest synagogue). Whenever we see each other we all do our bageling. And yeah, there are christians around who know some terms, but they don't really use them unless they're trying to proselytize.

Lori with you in a Jewish community it's different than when we aren't. You already know they are Jewish, and speaking the same language is connecting to each other. In a non Jewish community it's different. I would say those that speak the lingo are the ones that are not Jewish, they are Christians who have picked up on the lingo. There is a lot of Christians that read David Stern's translation The Jewish Bible. I'm saying that in a non Jewish community we do not talk the lingo, we do not bring attention to ourselves, we have a kindred spirit, we acknowledge it by a look, a smile, a nod. And anyone talking the Jewish lingo, we know are Christians. Just didn't want anyone to be deceived in thinking just because some talks the talk, doesn't mean they are one of you.