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Courage to Live Your Clarity

Having the guts to stand up to social pressure.

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Published: June 30, 2012

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Visitor Comments: 11

(9) Anonymous, March 2, 2015 3:53 PM

Swimming against the tide

A few weeks ago I was a guest at a baby shower. No, the mother to be was not Jewish. This was a Gentile woman who had married a Jewish man that I know. Since baby showers are not a Jewish custom, I chose to give this young woman a gift card instead of an actual gift. She can use this department store gift card any way she chooses. I was also able to get kosher food at this event. I was the ONLY person at this party who did both of those things, despite the fact that other Jewish women were in attendance. In doing these two things I felt TREMENDOUS clarity.

(8) Sharon, July 12, 2012 10:22 AM

Lori, May Hash-m bless you

Thanks for all the advice. Anonymous

(7) Miriam, July 5, 2012 12:50 PM

Having clarity even when society makes you feel shame

I couldn't agree with you more. But, I feel as though I am bucking the system. I recently felt empowered by God to start giving support services to parents of gay children in my local Jewish community. Many nonobservant Jews have been receptive to this. But, in some circles, the "shame" is so strong that people don't want to talk about it or to be seen at a public support group. I do have clarity of purpose. I do know that there are plenty of openly gay people who live an Orthodox lifestyle. It is a new relatively new phenomenon. I pray that God will continue to give me strength to deal with this issue.

(6) Rachel, July 4, 2012 11:02 PM

I'd add "the means to do it"

It's nice to say people should have the courage to do something, but I have to point out that for some people, the financial means are lacking. My husband and I made the choice to become Shabbat-observant (neither of us came from that background) and did not have the same career and financial advantages as we might if we were available "24/7". We tried to send out children to day schools, but when a health crisis removed me from the work force (and only a pittance of financial assistance offered by their schools), it wasn't a matter of courage -- we had no choice but to send them to public schools (which has been an awful experience.) So don't judge what you believe are other people's "choices" -- in some cases, they may not have a choice.

Anonymous, March 2, 2015 3:49 PM

To commenter #6 Rachel

I hope your health crisis has long since passed. Yes, yeshiva tuition certainly is hefty. However, you did what you could with the tools you had at hand. Have your children returned to yeshiva? Also, perhaps you and your husband can explore careers that would allow you to continue observing a Frum lifestyle. Finally, nobody with an ounce of sensitivity should judge the actions you take. We have no idea what goes on behind closed doors, and your actions need not concern anyone else.

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