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Stay at Home Mom?

A new mother is torn. What would you advise her to do?

Published: January 1, 2011


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Visitor Comments: 110

(110) Suzanne, June 12, 2012 4:28 PM

You don't get these years back

I think, if at all possible, the mother should stay home.

(109) miriam, November 4, 2011 2:52 PM

Keep working, but with a fabulous nanny at home

Rebbetzin Tzippora Heller says she always taught outside the home but spent a significant amount of her earnings on fabulous at home child-care, someone who was more like a bubby than a babysitter. As someone who now stays at home, which is incredible for my kids, I do think it's a mistake, though, as the financial pressure on my husband is overwhelming. Unfortunately, in most situations today, one income is simply not enough.

(108) Jane, March 8, 2011 2:31 AM

explore your feelings and reasons

I think that this mother has to really understand what's going on with her inside. Is she torn, because her husband is pressuring her to stay home? because he thinks she should, so the issue is not really her child, but her marriage? If she stayed at home and weren't at peace, internally, with it, then that would still not be good for her child; she might make her child "pay", in terms of anger toward the child, or making him feel guilty. Parents forget how flexible children are. They adapt; she is a loving mother, happy to see her child at the end of the day, I take it the father is too, and the daycare is a good place. Maybe there is something going on in the day care center that is making her child unhappy. But she should explore all of these questions, and most of all, needs to be at peace with her decision or the child will suffer, no matter what the decision is.

(107) Bette, January 14, 2011 6:19 PM

Stay st home

The ultimate reward of a loving mother is raising a healthy, happy and well-adjusted child. The time shared nurturing your child can't be quanitified; the positive lessons and memories endure forever. No amount of money even comes close!

(106) Anonymous, January 12, 2011 6:30 PM

Thanks Lori for bringing up this topic. The lady who asked for your advice, isn't the only one asking that question. When the field you have been educated in has made cutbacks, and not in demand, staying at home isn't always an option. I'm finding this stay at home time is an opportunity to study at home, thank goodness for those options that are available now.

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