About the Author


David Kilimnick

Finalist of the Laugh Factory's 'Funniest Person in the World' Comedy Competition, David did not compete on Shabbat and still, people do not feel his story is worthy enough to mention when discussing Sandy Koufax. The author of The Aliyah Dictionary and Dictionary of Jewish, David is the first Israeli to ever make it to the finals of a stand-up competition of this caliber.

David Kilimnick, known as Jerusalem's Comedian, and dubbed Israel ’s “father of Anglo comedy” by the Jerusalem Post, is leading the new pack of stand-up comics in Israel . At his Off The Wall Theater in Jerusalem (the first of its kind), Kilimnick has been offering up penetrating observations of life in his turbulent adopted country. Tourists and native Israelis alike have been flocking to his cozy, intimate club and raving about his unique ability to transform the daily chaos and aggravation of Israeli life into an evening full of laughter.

In his one-man Stand-up shows dedicated to the Olim (the creator and performer of The Aliyah Monologues, Find Me A Wife, Uncle 'D', Frum From Birth (Religiouos Manifesto and more), the rabbi turned comedian brings you on the emotional journey of the immigrant. Kilimnick’s universal humor takes you on a “tour of funny” through the Holy Land.

David has appeared on “Beep,” Israel ’s comedy network, Tzchok MeAvodah, starred on Jerusalem HaDashot, and has been hailed by the tough Israeli media as a “rising star” who possesses “Seinfeldian charm” when he takes to the stage.

You can see David in the 'Israel Comedy Experience' and his other one-man stand-up shows every week, at Jerusalem's Off The Wall Comedy Theater. David also travels internationally and is available for theater, community and campus shows and simchas, including shows for tour groups, you, your family and friends in Israel.

www.davidkilimnick.com www. israelcomedy.com
david@israelcomedy.com 972(50) 875-5688'


An Ode to Jewish Community Theater

When the beast from Beauty in the Beast takes off his mask, you realize it’s your friend Doobie from shul!

Israelis Are Not Rude

If you think Israelis are rude, you’ve got it all wrong.

How Israelis Handle the Biased Media

The media wants Israel to let terrorists roam free so they can instigate rocket attacks and mass shootings.

New Wise Men of Chelm Stories

Tales from the shul board.

How to Visit a Jewish Retirement Home

I’ve been closely watching families who visit Jewish retirement homes and I think we can do better.

Sukkot Around the World

In Canada, Jews use heaters, in Florida, air conditioners, but at the core, it’s all the same.

People You See in Shul on The High Holidays

Every shul has the guy who times the tekiya gedola shofar blast.

Jewish Year in Review 5779

The top Jewish news stories from around the world in 5779.

I’m Sorry for My Selichot

As part of my repentance process, I hope it’s okay that I open up my heart to you. Don’t judge.

Preparing Your Child for Success at Jewish School

Beware, it all starts in kindergarten…

Questions People Ask Rabbis

As a rabbi, I’ve heard my fair share of interesting questions…

Reasons for Jewish Singles to Get Married

Tu B’Av is here – the Jewish holiday of love, and that means it’s time for all of us singles to get married.

My Outside the Box Ideas to Help Bring Redemption

Tell people others aren’t feeling well. Sick people bring out the best in us.

Jewish Summer Camp Lingo

From the ropes course to the room with the air conditioning, this is what you need to know about Jewish summer camp.

What Makes Israeli Humor

I’ve been a comedian in Israel for over 15 years. Here are my thoughts on what makes Israeli humor.

Jewish Summer Camp Characters

The cook, the nature guy, the canteen guy, the local who mows the lawn – who remembers these people from Jewish summer camp?

Jewish Summer Camp Activities

Here’s a list of things you or your child will be doing at camp this summer.

How Jews Visit the Sick

When people are sick, we bring food. That’s just what Jews do.

Making Jewish Food Dairy

How many good dairy foods do we really have?

My Favorite Spots in Jerusalem

The Old City. The history. The immigrants. The angry taxi drivers. I love it all.

Jewish Wedding Gift Etiquette

What to gift and what not to gift.

Things That Make Israel Special

In Israel we don’t like uniforms. This is why it looks like the mailman is stealing your mail.

Jewish Workouts

Passover is behind us, so let’s get in shape!

David’s Pesach Seder Guide

It’s amazing how talking about slavery can bring a Jewish family together.

My Israel Elections Overview

Israel’s many political parties and why I am voting for all of them.

Tactical Eating in Jewish Institutions

What Jewish food doesn’t taste better with some mayonnaise?

Playing Games in Israel

Board games are not just a chance to have fun in Israel; they teach kids how to be good Jews.

25 Ways You Know I’m a Proud Religious Jew

For starters, I get served first on a plane.

A Jerusalem Basketball Game Experience

Going to a professional basketball game in Israel felt like a religious experience.

Julian Edelman, Super Bowl MVP

Whether Julian Edelman is Jewish or not, what matters is that we can tell jokes about it.

Why Jews Love the Super Bowl

The NFL is the only league that loves Jews and is not anti-Semitic because its games are on Sundays.

I’m Offended

The only group that it’s ok to offend appears to be the Jews. More specifically, religious Jews.

Humorous Guide to How to Prepare for Shabbat

You will run out of hot water. For this reason, you should start showering on Thursday morning.

Top Jewish Stories of 2018

This year American Jews almost experienced a tragedy: It was rumored that Entenmann’s was going to lose its kosher certification.

Jewish Singles Events

Unfortunately, if there’s a choice between a conversation with a woman or latkes with sour cream, I’m with the latkes.

How to Make Chanukah Religious Again

In order to make Chanukah more religious, I’m using fat from shmaltz flanken meat that stays in the stomach for eight days.

Reasons I Wasn’t Accepted into the Israeli Army

I wanted to serve the army, but they knew better.

Foods Jews Love to Eat: Sephardic Jews Edition

I know nothing about Yemenite history. All I know is that they know how to make bread taste amazing.

Food Jews Love To Eat: Ashkenazi Edition

There is one thing that connects all Jews. Food.

New Laws for Jerusalem

No third graders directing traffic.

An Ode to Jewish Delis

Nothing says American Jewish tradition like the deli.

Jewish Ways to Lose Weight After the Holidays

The Anti-Simcha Diet is where you don’t go to any family functions. That’s 5 pounds right there.

Top Sukkot Decorations

From the paper chain to the ushpizin poster to the Christmas lights, I’ve got your Sukkah covered.

Rosh Hashanah Resolutions

God, please help me to stop eating chocolate.

Jewish Back to School Shopping Explained

No I cannot explain why your tuition doesn’t include pencils.

How Jews Do Summer Vacations

Jews don’t pack clothes. We just pack food.

How to Enjoy a Summer Vacation in Israel

Going on a hike, or “Tiyul”, is a great way to experience what’s called in the Middle East “dehydration.”

Tips for Your Online Jewish Dating Profile

Tip #1: Do whatever you can to make sure your profile picture doesn’t look like you.

Fast Day Survival Tips

My techniques to make it through the Tisha B’Av fast.

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