this illness is dibilitating it knows no shame and i can't seem to get over it help me please.

Unfortunately far too short

The purpose of the arts (not decor nor entertainment) are to inspire us to greater empathy and aspire to become better human beings. I think it's kind of strange that he condemns collecting art for arts' sake but is fine a long as it's an investment. Similarly, while much of popular culture, including many Hollywood movies, are just entertainment, it's unfortunate if he also avoids all live theatre. I can't imagine my life without the profound wisdom and joy that the works of Shakespeare, Shaw, O'Neill, and other tremendous playwrights have given me over half a century.
Having suffered from both post partum depression and also depression following a brain injury, I would urge anyone suffering to see a medical doctor psychiatrist. If there is a chemical or neurological aspect, you will need the help of an MD. Don't feel guilty.

Lucid, to the point, and down to earth. Fantastic!
I am craving more videos of Rabbi Akiva in Aish.
Thanks!!