Rabbi Yaakov Salomon, C.S.W. is a noted psychotherapist, in private practice in Brooklyn, N.Y. for over 25 years. He is a Senior Lecturer and the Creative Director of Aish Hatorah's Discovery Productions. He is also an editor and author for the Artscroll Publishing Series and a member of the Kollel of Yeshiva Torah Vodaath.
Rabbi Salomon is co-author, with Rabbi Noah Weinberg, of the best selling book "What the Angel Taught You; Seven Keys to Life Fulfillment," (Mesorah), and is also the co-producer of the highly-acclaimed film, "Inspired."
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In these marvelous stories -- brimming with wit, understanding, a touch of irony and a large helping of authentic Torah perspective -- we will walk with a renowned and experienced psychotherapist and popular author through the pathways of contemporary life: its crowded sidewalks, its pedestrian malls, and the occasional dead end street. This is a walk through our lives that will be fun, entertaining -- and eye-opening. In our full -- sometimes overfull -- and complex lives, Yaakov Salomon is a welcome and much-needed voice of sanity and reason.
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(7) Anonymous, August 8, 2015 7:05 PM
Judge Favorably
The Mishna uses the phrase, "Judge Favorably."
Rabbi Salomon sounds like he recommends creating a frame where we cannot judge at all, but rather we blindly block out the bad, simple-mindedly frame in the good, and suspend judgement entirely.
"Judge favorably" is, in its plain meaning, seeing the whole picture clearly, then judging with focus on its positive aspects.
(6) Sheila Deutsch, July 31, 2015 8:28 PM
somethings cannot be overlooked.
In the scene that you mentioned there is a strong chance that someone is shoplifting. This should be reported. The store is losing money. If it is done discretely and she is Innocent there will be no harm. SD
(5) Dvirah, July 31, 2015 2:43 PM
Not All the Time
Yes, there are many situations where that is an excellent game to play - but not when a crime may have been committed! In the case described, I would suggest tapping the girl on the shoulder and quietly telling her what you saw and ask for an explanation. Her reactions should let you know if she was actually shop-lifting or not, and you can try to persuade her to return the object if she was. One can thus prevent a crime without "ratting" on the criminal - who may think twice the next time.
(4) Anonymous, July 30, 2015 1:03 AM
Now that's a gorgeous game!!
(3) Goldy, July 28, 2015 9:57 PM
love it :)
Cant wait to try this with my family! what a great way to train ourselves to think positive. and the effects flow over into everything...
(2) Alice, July 28, 2015 8:04 PM
Reframe wrong-doing?!
Sorry Rabbi, you are usually right-on, but not with this one. There can never be a reframing of illegal/hazardous/negative behavior! This is why we are in the state we are in: " well, I'm sure there was a very good explanation for why they did what they did", no! Wrong is wrong and we need to finally stand by that.
(1) Sidney, July 28, 2015 5:23 PM
Two Points
There is an obligation though - not to cause others to judge you unfavorably if you can avoid it.
1. Thus in the theoretical scenario, the employee while still in her uniform should remove the item and bring it to the Employees Only area. There she should put it in her purse, etc.
2. Once or twice a year I bring a spoiled product back with the receipt. A managerial type person invariably will throw it out and if I want a replacement, (instead of a refund) he/she tells me to get another one from the new delivery and put it in my bag. What I do as I approach the area is hold up my receipt at shoulder level so that someone else could deduce that it was a replacement. It is not fool-proof but at least it is a good attempt.