I have a friend who grew up with a pretty generic name. It was one of those popular names of the generation with no particular meaning attached to it, no unique hopes or aspirations. As she progressed along her Jewish journey over the last four years, she was continually being asked, “What’s your Hebrew name?” After conferring with family members and checking all accessible family records, she concluded that, along with most of her relatives, she never received one.
Initially that didn’t seem like a big deal. Although she didn’t love her name – it also conjured up all the jarring ways in which she had been judged unfavorably or misunderstood throughout her childhood and into her adult life as well – she just accepted her name as an unchanging part of her reality.
But was it? Just before Rosh Hashanah a mutual friend referred her to a local Rebbetzin who makes a study of the meaning and power of our Jewish name. After a long and intimate conversation, she suggested the name Shira, a name that seems to reflect a spontaneous outburst of song and embodies the joy and openness and desire to connect to the Almighty that was so definitive of my friend.
After doing a little Torah “research”, she decided to take this name or, as she says more accurately, “the name took her.”
And in that moment, something spectacular and unexpected occurred. Her whole life changed. All the ways that her old self had been constricted by unfulfilled familial expectations, all the destructive and critical internal dialogue that had been her constant companion, all the dictates of society that had ruled her behavior vanished.
Those limitations were for someone else, for a person with a different name. They simply did NOT apply to Shira.
Shira could soar. Shira could fly. Shira could feel the gift of unconditional love offered to her by the members of her new community and by her blossoming relationship with the Almighty. It wasn’t just a name change; it was a transformation.
She is opening herself up to a new world, a world of depth and breadth and meaning. And all of us who are her friends are privileged to take this journey with her. Now she feels like the possibilities are endless.
I forgot to mention that Shira is not some yet unformed 18-year-old. Nor is she a mid-30’s young professional. She’s not even what’s considered middle-aged. Shira is turning 75, please God. As she herself says, she is living proof that you are never too old to change.
And this isn’t just a mild change. This is a whole uprooting. She is constantly learning and growing and koshering her kitchen and keeping Shabbos and, well it’s just a big wow.
It didn’t start with the name change. The name change was the natural outgrowth of her studies and her personal evolution. But the name change resulted in dramatic and unexpected growth, in the introduction of new freedoms and new opportunities.
As Shira says, she feels like she has come home. And she is constantly appreciative of the gifts she has been given, never taking anything for granted. The Almighty seems to have plucked her out of her previous life and identity into this new world. But our friend Shira was able to see the possibilities placed in front of her and take full advantage of them. And we, her friends, are all the richer for it.
They say “It’s all in the name.” Sometimes that’s really true.
(11) רחל איסטרין, December 9, 2020 2:40 PM
beautiful and inspiring
What an extraordinary and beautiful person Shira is! I find her story inspiring and I'm sure that many others do too. Her meaningful name reveals the inner person better than any description. Thanks for sharing this story.
(10) Jacob Kawas, November 11, 2020 2:17 AM
I'd love to tour the Holy Land
As my first name is Jacob, I believe there is something this ministry holds for me that I need to know of and a trip to Isreal is an opportunity for that mystery to unfold.
(9) Anonymous, November 10, 2020 4:12 PM
?Via Don Morosini,125
Gostaria muito de saber o significado do meu nome!as minhas irmas tem os nomes lindos;Magali ,Marta e Anna e nao entendo o porque, do meu ser esse como me chama!Gostaria de mudar,mais quem sabe se o seu significado quer dizer o melhor para mim?
(8) SAS Levi, November 10, 2020 3:38 PM
What’s in a name
In some esoterical and mysterious way a name carries a mission in which to direct our life. The holy letters that combine to give us our are determined in heaven and are our spiritual dna. I have been blessed into an insight to my own name which has brought me to this conclusion.l was very happy to read that Shira found new and meaningful value to her life. It’s never too late
(7) Shira, November 10, 2020 3:23 PM
Name chane
Shira Is also my new name taken after several years of study , moving and changing my life I told this name Shira also in my 7th decade! I now live in Israel continuing to learn. Mazal Tov to Shira, we are taking a similar path!
(6) Nancy, November 10, 2020 11:48 AM
I was given a Yiddish name instead of a Hebrew one
My mother told me that in infancy a rabbi had named me Necha Leba. My first name is Nancy and my middle name is Linda. I don't know why I was not named Nechama, but apparently that was the decision made at the time. I have always liked the name Naomi, but have remained at a crossroads re: changing my name. Kol Ha Kavod to Shira!!
Jewish Mom, November 11, 2020 3:45 PM
Beautiful name!
Who knows why the rabbi didn't choose Nechama?! Maybe he knew your mom's grandmother who had that name or maybe it was his own mother's name and he thought you're so adorable, he wanted you to carry it ;-)!
All kidding aside, if you would like to Hebraicize your name, Necha is a Yiddish derivative of Nechama (meaning source of comfort and consolation) so you can change it to the original if you prefer. Leba means beloved and its Hebrew equivalent is Ahuva. Nechama Ahuva is a beautiful name! Personally, I love Yiddish - it makes me feel my Bubby o.b.m.'s loving stroke - so I like the name Necha Leba as well but you're the one who needs to like and relate to your name. Naomi means pleasant - a pretty name but not the original meaning of your own name, if that's important to you. Whichever name you choose (or stick with), may you continue to grow and become the best you!
Nancy, November 12, 2020 12:43 PM
To commenter Jewish Mom
Thank you so much for your feedback! You helped me make the decision to keep the name(s) I already have. Wishing you good health and safety!
(5) esti, November 10, 2020 10:34 AM
Helping by using the new name
Bs.d Thank you for such a meaningful article! Sometimes we meet people we have known for years who have done a similar change. Our effort in getting used to calling them by their Hebrew name is a mitzvah in helping them
(4) Debby Segura, November 9, 2020 2:11 AM
All true!
What a beautiful article about a meaningful change. A blessing!
(3) Traci Hamer, November 9, 2020 1:28 AM
Beautifully said, and a very inspirational article Emuna. Yeah Shira!
(2) Carol Schaeffer, November 9, 2020 12:56 AM
Wow!
What an amazing article! Thank you so much for being my teacher, my mentor and my friend. I am honored,
(1) Martin, November 8, 2020 8:41 PM
A beautiful story.
I have always liked the fact that jewish names have a meaning and often wonder what parents are thinking when they give their child a name that may sound creative at the time, but burdens the child for time immemorial. Thank you for sharing this story.