The Latest Jewlarious Jokes

Together Forever

Moishe and Miriam Kopplewitz had been married for 45 years and had raised 11 children and were blessed with countless grandchildren.

When interviewed by a local newspaper and asked the secret to raising so many children and staying together all that time, Miriam replied, "Many years ago we made a promise to each other: the first one to leave has to take all the kids."

Look at This!

Rivkah Silverman was having trouble with the idea of turning 40 and was extremely sensitive to any signs of advancing age. When she found a prominent gray hair in her bangs, she pointed to her forehead and asked her husband Reuven, "Oy, have you seen this?"

"What?" Reuven asked. "The wrinkles?"

Engine Trouble

A large two-engine train was crossing New York and at the helm was a train engineer who had recently moved from Israel – Itzik Hadari. After they had gone some distance, one of the engines broke down.

"No problem," Itzik said and carried on at half power. Farther on down the line, the other engine broke down and the train came to a standstill.

Itzik decided he should inform the passengers about why the train had stopped, and made the following announcement, "Ladies and gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that both engines have failed, and we will be stuck here for some time. The good news is that you decided to take the train and not fly."


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