When I saw the horrific photos of this morning's terror attack in Jerusalem, all I could think of was a scene from the Holocaust. Men lying in pools of blood – wrapped in a tallis and tefillin on their foreheads.
Twenty-six orphans. Who will be their father now? Wives turned suddenly into widows. Families destroyed. A shul turned into a massacre site. It is too heartbreaking to be real.
This morning in America, I heard my children awakening. Their footsteps echoed softly down the stairs, and I fought to keep back my tears as I thought about the 26 children who woke up today to find their fathers gone forever. My heart felt like it was caught in throat. My oldest daughter knew right away.
"Did something happen in Israel?" she asked. I showed her the street where the attack happened – with our former apartment building on Agassi Street in the background.
"But how could it have happened right there?!" she exclaimed.
That had been one of my first thoughts, too. How could a terror attack be right near the playground where my children used to laugh and slide and look up for their father's face as he came out of shul? I remember the children on their way to school at 7 a.m. A beautiful city turned into the scene of a nightmare. How?
How could it be that these color photos from 2014 look so eerily like a black and white picture from the Holocaust? How could this be happening?
Four Myths about Tragedy
In the face of this overwhelming horror, I remind myself that we have to face reality, and avoid these four myths about tragedy:
Myth 1 - It only happens in 'other' places.
The first thing many of us do when reading about a tragedy is to disassociate ourselves from the place where it occurred. "It's far away... That's a road I never travel... I don't use the light rail, or take that bus, or eat in that restaurant..."
This terror attack drives home the importance of dispelling this myth. It happened in a place where many Americans live and work and travel to. It happened in a synagogue where any of us could have been. Tragedy doesn't happen only in specific places and times. As anyone who walked down the streets of sunny Manhattan on the morning of September 11 can attest, tragedy occurs wherever evil finds a way into this world.
Myth 2 - The tragedy is over when the funerals end.
During this terrifying, grief-drenched period of terror attacks in Israel, many of us are afraid to read the news each morning. As innocent people are murdered and as funerals echo through the land, we feel the heaviness and injustice as a nation.
But when the funerals end and the story of the attack fade, many of us forget. There are heart-broken parents. Lost widows. Inconsolable children. Severely injured people who survived the attacks but will never see or walk or hear again. The tragedy lingers for months and years.
And for those who have lost their loved ones, it goes on forever.
Myth 3 - This only affects those who live there.
We sometimes make the mistake of thinking that a terror attack in Jerusalem affects only those who live nearby. Or those who live in Israel. Or those who have families there.
That isn't true. Every time we lose a fellow Jew we experience a tremendous loss as a nation. Every Jew has a mission, a treasure, a gift to contribute to the world. And when we lose that person we lose that gift. We will never know what could have been had this person lived, whose lives they may have affected, what wisdom and light they might have brought into this world.
Each of us, wherever we are in the world, should feel this loss keenly. As a nation, we have lost an important part of what makes us whole. The effect will reverberate and touch each of our lives for a long time.
Myth 4 - Such barbarism can be explained.
My older children ask: "Why would someone do that? Why would they go into a synagogue and start shooting innocent fathers like that?" They still believe that I can give some kind of answer to make sense of this tragedy, to at least explain the searing pain.
But I have no answer. No one really does. There is evil and darkness in the world. We continue to fight back with the light of our Torah and the strength of our faith that goodness is more powerful than destruction. But we don't know why this person was taken from the world and not the person sitting beside him. We don't know why tragedy struck this city or that street. Terror attacks cannot be explained. Tragedy cannot give us any answers.
But we can learn to feel the loss the way we should as a nation.
As if the fathers were our own.
As if the orphaned children are ours.
As if the newly widowed wives are our sisters.
Because they are. The Jewish people are one family, and the pain echoes around the world as we mourn this horrific attack.
Pray for those who are injured. Pray for those who have lost loved ones. Every tear, every prayer, every Jew who mourns makes a difference. Because the one thing that is always true about tragedy is that it reminds us how much we all need each other.
(17) charles richman, November 22, 2014 6:31 PM
From four rabbis wives and 24 children we all lost at the Har Nof Shul
With broken hearts, drenched in tears shed over the split blood of holy men – the heads of our families.
We call on our brethren wherever they are – let us come together so that we may merit mercy from Heaven, and let’s accept upon ourselves to increase love and comradery, between each individual and each community.
We ask that every person accept upon himself on this Sabbath Eve (Parshat Toldot, November 21-22, 2014), to set aside the day of Shabbat as a day of unconditional love, a day during which we will refrain from words of disagreement and division, from words of gossip and slander.
May this serve to elevate the souls of our husbands and fathers who were slaughtered while sanctifying God’s name.
God will look down from the heavens, see our suffering, wipe away our tears and put an end to our tribulations.
May we merit seeing the coming of our Moshiach (Messiah) speedily in our days. Amen.
Signed with a torn heart,
Mrs. Chaya Levin and family
Mrs. Bryna Goldberg and family
Mrs. Yaacova Kupensky and family
Mrs. Bashy Twersky and family
(16) mgoldberg, November 21, 2014 1:56 PM
I would prefer the sober consideration of all the commandments of Mohammed, as per the submission of 'all others', all infidels, and all dcimmi. This prophet who gave no prophecy, as far as I can see, in his book, was a master sumbitter, the greatest of tyrants and a serial killer with a prayer shawl. To deny the massive, slaughterlng, submitting, history and theology is why it is inconceivable as to why these slaughterers of his did what they did. That the muslim politicians call for prayers to honor the homicidists should give more than a hint as to the obvious. First-That it is inconceivable for us to imagine a theology that calls for the annihilation and at the very least the submission and degradation of us, and all others is the problem for us. And of course what to do in response. Every jihadist should be killed and buried in a pigs body- apologies to the poor pigs and then fed to large white sharks in the ocean. Then take all the homes and property of all the jihadists and give them to the poor of Israel and the victims families. And that's for starters.
No more prison sentences for would be slaughterers. Oh, and tell Obama and the Europeans that they can continue to make schteltls of their own nations to their hearts desire and to their own detriment.
(15) Donna Perel, November 21, 2014 1:24 PM
Dayenu
We come together again and again in tragedy. We daven, we cry,we say tehillim we are one. Let us be one without sorrow. Let us embrace each other in times of simcha. Let us be one and accept each other.Thank you for your beautiful article.
(14) Nancy, November 20, 2014 11:22 AM
Thank you for articulating my feelings
When one Jewish person suffers, then all of us feel the pain.
(13) Anonymous, November 20, 2014 10:04 AM
Jews are not the only ones who mourn. Many Christians mourn with you. These atrocities are a manifestation of the battle in the heavenlies between Satan and G-d.
(12) marie raca, November 20, 2014 1:55 AM
I am so sorry for this tragedy. i am on the wall for israel each day crying out to Elohim. i am not jewish yet i have a great love for your land and your people. Shalom
(11) I Challenge You, November 19, 2014 9:10 PM
Stop talking and end this once and for all
The problem is AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN ISLAM. The Jewish people did not annihilate Amalek and this is one of the results. The Angel Gavriel (Gevurah - Discipline - rigidity) came to Mohamed and created a challenge for the world. A religion of rigid discipline and abomination that the world refuses to recognize, despite being in their face in front of their nose. No more excuses -- Remember Amalek. If one comes to kill you, wake up earlier and kill them first. You must kill Islam before it kills you. Remember Purim. The decree could no be taken back but the Jews could fight back. FIGHT BACK!! Remove the threat. Send the practicing Muslims out of Israel to Jihad with ISIS so they kill each other. Do you prefer the sounds of the gutted rabbaim, collapsing and wheezing blood and the cracking of heads and Tefillin on the floor. WAKE UP!
EG, November 23, 2014 12:24 AM
Islam is Yishmael, not Amalek
Amalek was the grandson of Eisav. Haman was of the descendants of Amalek. The Arabs are from Yishmael.
(10) Yonit Klein, November 19, 2014 8:36 PM
Debbie, I Wish ...
Thank you for this wonderful article. I wish you were here with us in Israel.
(9) Yehudit, November 19, 2014 8:06 PM
ALL Are Our Family
ALL Jews are one family. The Torah says that all Jews are responsible for one another. We all need to feel the immense shock and sorrow of this tragedy. Also, remember that the children, wives, and entire extended families of each Rabbi and others that were killed or wounded are suffering terribly and need our prayers. In addition, can you imagine what the other worshipers at that service felt like at the time of the attack and how they feel now ? ? ? ! ! Certainly there was frantic fright and desperation, to put it mildly, and possibly "guilt for surviving"! They also greatly need our prayers. We Jews are all one family!
(8) Anonymous, November 19, 2014 7:57 PM
The terror is here already--in the medical system & on the road
Medical System in America: a Somali [they are Moslems] respiratory therapist, Mohammad, tried to kill my son in the emergency room by kinking a tube. Thank God an American Black saw what he did & called him on it and asked him to fix it. I was in the emergency room myself, the Somali technician was nice to me, until he saw my son -- yarmulke, tzitzis. Then a angry cloud came over his face.
On the road: friends of mine and I have been hit by high speeding Somali drivers. Our community is organizing to give each other rides now. At a gas station near a taxi stand a Somali driver saw my son & asked if we are Jewish. What's the halacha on how to answer this question, anyone?
(7) Yonah, November 19, 2014 6:14 PM
save lives
I am an innovative genius......if those with the right contacts to get things DONE in Israel, contact me I can tell them solutions to many (not all) of their serious problems! If anyone really cares to get problems SOLVED/and prevented!
Joyce Perez, November 20, 2014 6:21 AM
How can we send cards and money to the families of these slain rabbis
How can we se end monoy to these families? Addresses?
Anonymous, November 23, 2014 6:09 PM
Donations
Donations for the families of the victims can be made through the following link: http://www.harnofonline.com/terrorfund.aspx
Chana Zelasko, November 23, 2014 6:12 PM
Another address for donations
You can send donations to Kupat HaIr for case 2159 (earmarked for Har Nof).
(6) Neil S. Friedman MD, November 19, 2014 5:34 PM
Return
Perhaps these tragedies continue because the vast majority of Jews have not returned to the land that Hashem promised His people. Hashem is weeping because the wonderful gift He has given His children has been rebuked by the majority of them.
If only you could experience the tragedy as an Israeli, and be in the crosshairs of the terrorist yourself, everyday, jogging on the land of your forefathers and skiing in the hills of the Golan Heights .....then maybe there would be nothing to weep about..
(5) Anonymous, November 19, 2014 2:59 PM
Jews must come together and honor the memory of holy lives lost.
We must come together, and in doing so, honor the memory of these holy lives that have been cut from us. We have lost a descendant of the Baal Shem Tov. We have lost scholars, fathers, brothers, peaceful, kind, and intelligent folk. We have lost a precious 3 month old baby. We must talk about them, their families, their lives, their accomplishments, their promises, their prospects, the lessons they learned, and the lessons they taught. Their pictures, their writings, their lives, their families, should be held up to the world to show what good is, and that good is what we value. Baseless hatred of our brothers must be stopped. We must go forward in unity and love, giving praise to HaShem for the goodness we have seen in our lives and our people.
Am y'Israel Chai.
(4) Bracha Goetz, November 19, 2014 2:13 PM
Beautifully expressed!
(3) Sara Yoheved Rigler, November 19, 2014 9:09 AM
Thank you for this gem of an article.
(2) Jacob, November 18, 2014 11:55 PM
thank you
Thank you for these words. May we trust in Hashem, always.
(1) T, November 18, 2014 8:19 PM
Thank you
Thank you for this article.