“Remember that you were once slaves in Egypt…”
The exodus and the miracles of the Passover story happened a long time ago, but they are still part of our contemporary consciousness because of the power of memory. Thomas Cahill, the Catholic writer who authored the best-selling book, The Gifts of the Jews, concluded that it was the Torah with its commandments to remember that gave the world the concept of time and a reverence for the past. Passover speaks to all generations, reminding us to not only recall our past but to also shape our future.
But not everyone remembers, and tragically, some choose to forget, as demonstrated by the incredible incident I had with Shmuel's Seder plate.
A few years ago I was browsing in an antique store on the East Side in New York when I spotted an all-too-familiar object. I recognized it immediately, even before I spotted the family name clearly etched on its border. How could I not know what it was when I had been so involved in its story? After all, my eulogy of Shmuel, a miraculous survivor of the infamous Auschwitz concentration camp, focused on it.
What a tale it had been. The Germans had rounded up all the Jews in his little town for deportation. Some believed that they were merely being transported to another site to be used for labor. But Shmuel knew that they were meant to be murdered. He understood that the Nazis wanted to eliminate every Jew as well as every reminder of their religious heritage.
Had he been caught, he would have paid with his life.
So Shmuel took a chance. Had he been caught, he would have paid with his life. But he did what he had to do so that something might remain -- so that even if not a single Jew in the world stayed alive, someone might find it, reflect, and remember. He paced off 26 steps, corresponding to the numerical value of God’s name, from the apple tree alongside his house and carefully buried his treasure – a silver Passover plate.
He wished he could have hidden much more. How he wanted to preserve a Torah scroll. But he had so little time, so little space for concealing an object of value. His choice, in retrospect, seemed almost divinely inspired for its symbolism – the key vessel used to commemorate the festival of freedom. Shmuel thought, with what he later conceded was far too much optimism, miracles could perhaps once more occur even in modern times. And from that day forward not a day went by in the hells of the concentration camps that his mind did not return to his Seder plate in its special hiding place.
Shmuel could never explain how he, out of all his family and friends, survived. In his heart of hearts, he once confided to me, it may have been because he viewed his continued existence on earth as a holy mission -- to go back to his roots and uncover his own symbol of survival. Incredibly enough, in ways that defy all logic and that Shmuel only hinted to me, this escapee of 20th-century genocide was reunited with his reminder of deliverance from age-old Egyptian oppression. Shmuel journeyed back to his home, found his tree, counted off his steps, dug where he remembered he had buried it and successfully retrieved his Seder plate. It became a symbol of his own liberation as well. With it he celebrated dozens of Passovers, until his death.
That Seder plate, in almost total disbelief, is what I saw in the shop for sale. Where was it from, I inquired. What was it doing for sale when it carried with it so many precious memories? "Yes, I want to buy it," I assured the dealer, "but I need to know how you happen to have it."
"It was part of the sale of the contents of an estate by the children," the dealer replied. You see, the deceased was religious but his descendants aren’t. So they said they don’t really have any need for 'items like these.'"
The very symbol that sanctifies memory was discarded by those who forgot their past.
The very symbol that sanctifies memory was discarded by those who forgot their past.
If you have a loved one who suffers from Alzheimer's you know how horrible it can be to live without an awareness of events that came before. We don’t have a name for a similar condition that describes ignorance of our collective past. Yet the voluntary abandonment of historic memory is equally destructive.
How I wish that the unsentimental harshness of Shmuel’s descendants was just an aberration, a remarkably unusual demonstration of insensitivity not likely to be duplicated by others. But the sad truth is that we are part of a “throwaway” culture that gives equal weight to used cars, worn furniture, and old family treasures. What has served the past is of no interest if its sole claim to respectability is its gift of associations.
Memorabilia have lost their allure because we no longer revere the meaning of memories. So what, I am often asked, if my grandparents used this every holiday? We have no space, we have no need for it. As if utilitarian function is the only rationale for holding on to something that enables us to preserve our past!
The ring with which I married my wife may not be the most expensive but I pray it remains in my family as a legacy of the love we shared, perhaps to be used again by my grandchildren. The cup with which I usher in the sanctity of every Sabbath may reflect the poverty of my youth, but I hope it is passed on to the future as a testament to the importance of religious values in our household. If what we treasured is held sacred by my children, then perhaps what we lived for will also be reverentially recalled.
“Unless we remember, we cannot understand.”
“Unless we remember,” English novelist Edward Morgan Foster put it so beautifully, “we cannot understand.”
That’s why I weep for my friend Shmuel, whose family has become an orphan in history, severed from its past.
And that’s why I keep retelling Shmuel’s story on Passover, because I believe it captures the essential message of this holiday. God commanded us to remember because it is only by treasuring the messages of the past that we can understand the present and hope for a more blessed future.
(26) Anonymous, April 10, 2012 8:19 AM
Save the seder plate!
My great grandparents were religious. My grandparents and parents were not. I stayed with my great grandparents often until I was 6, even though they spoke very little English and I loved them dearly. My family moved to another state and my great grandparents passed away. I spent the night at a new friend's house, and at dinner, they were singing blessings for Shabbat. I recognised the words and sang along. From that night on, I began to go to synnagogue and to live as a Jew. Shortly before my wedding, an old family friend gave me my grandparents' kidush cups. My husband and I used them at our wedding, and I felt like my great gandparents were there. Save that Seder plate! I hope that one day you will be able to return it to one of your friend's grandchildren or great grandchildren.
Fred, March 29, 2013 10:12 AM
Missing the point
The seder plate is what saved Shmuel. Knowing that only he knew of it's location, he was determined to survive and get it back after having lost so much else. Yes, for Shmuel the plate had great significance. But we already live in a materialistic enough world. Where we prize our possessions be they jewelry, house, cars, clothes, or bank accounts. There is no mitzva to accumulate or cherish. As a religion, Judaism today is already too much about form and too little about essence. I care less about what my children and grand children do with my possessions after I die than about what they hold dear from the mitzvot we are required to do. Sell all my stuff and give it to charity, for charity and kindness are worthwhile mitzot to keep. Keeping my things in the attic serve no value at all. Nice story Rabbi Blech, but I think you missed the boat here. If the plate helps you remember your friend with happiness than great. Otherwise it's value is the silver content and not much more. No need to chastise his children or grandchildren. Hopefully he will have left them a legacy worth much more than the plate.
(25) Anonymous, April 9, 2012 6:35 PM
good for you!
yasher koach to rabbi blech for taking home the meaningful seder plate and paying honor to its original owner! although on shabbat i use whichever candlesticks speak to me on that particular friday afternoon, on holidays i always light candles in those which were passed on to me by my grandmothers, obm. in this way i honor them as their memories bathe us in light at the table. and the original use of these otherwise benign silver sticks is honored as well. i make sure that my guests know that a previous generation of jewish women join us in this way. someday (not soon!!!) my mother will pass along her candlesticks, which were used by her grandmother, to my daughter, and the cycle will continue. and, with luck, i too will have a granddaughter, or two, to whom i can leave these most important treasures. l'dor v dor. chag sameach!
(24) Anonymous, April 9, 2012 4:35 PM
To destroy the people and keep the relics.
I just came back from Savannah, Ga. and visited the oldest synagogue in North America. We were told that contrary to belief, the Jewish people were to be eliminated by the Nazis, but artifacts such as Holocaust Torahs were preserved in order to display them after the war in museums as trophies. Many were sent to London where apparently they exist today.
(23) Anonymous, April 9, 2012 2:03 PM
I Once Went to an Estate Sale in the House Across the Street
B"H Soon after I moved into my house twenty-seven years ago this Sunday, I saw a sign stating that there was going to be an estate sale inside the house across the street from me. A long-time lover of antiques - I still own and use and lovingly polish the carved and inlaid dark walnut lamp table that was a wedding present to my parents, o.b.m., in 1937 - I eagerly attended the sale. I don't remember what else was for sale that day. All I remember is seeing a chromium-plated, five-light Shabbat menora WITH FIVE CANDDLES HALF-WAY BURNED DOWN still in it! The shock of seeing this simple yet lovely and obviously-used-for-Shabbat candelabra sitting there with its candles snuffed out just as the life of the Jewish lady who had lit them faithfully every week had been snuffed out by illness or injury made me cry inside. How could her own children not want their own mother's Shabbat lichter? I could understand their passing it down to someone in the family if they already had their own candelabra - when I made aliyah, I gave my daughter my lichter because I didn't like it very much, but it had been in the famiy for generations - but to sell it to strangers? And worse still, with the candles still in it? Unthinkable, and so disrespectful of the lady who owned it and of the very Shabbat itself! I remember the shock and deep sorrow I felt to this very day.
(22) Iris Moskovitz, April 12, 2010 12:48 AM
Quite disturbing for me . Such a shame about the children.
This story reminds me of a very disturbing situation my husband found himself involved in. While throwing away our rubbish, right before Pesach, my husband came across a slew of Pesach Haggadahs sitting at the top of the dumpster.He immediately went to retrieve them, when the person whom dumped them inside saw him. He wanted to know why he was so interested in taking out his useless garbage. My husband, child of Holocaust survivors, just stood there, in total shock. Nebach, yeah?
(21) Monica, April 9, 2010 6:14 PM
Why do I find this story horrifying?
From such a belief to such disconnect? How is it possible? Didn't he impart to his children the importance of roots and memories? Very disturbing
(20) SusanE, April 3, 2010 5:09 AM
Everything was 'New" at one time.
Having been in the business of watching estates liquidated I don't have a soft spot for family heirlooms. I see many families fight over an item rather than look lovingly at it's significance. If the family isn't interested, I would rather see it in an Antique shop and purchased by someone like you who will use it and appreciate it. The story about the seder plate is moving and meant something to Shmuel, because it was his life reflected every year in the plate. Now, you have it, and it means something to you because you know the story. It might become your responsibility to keep the story alive. You have passed it on to us. And thank you for that. If you have children you can pass the story and the plate down to them. Since you are a Jew and Shmuel was a Jew then you are united with him as much as his family. ------------------------------------------------------- Perhaps we should pass on sentimental items to our children now while we are alive, along with our stories so they know firsthand.
(19) Anonymous, March 29, 2010 2:14 PM
Life's circumstances have allowed me to lose everything I have ever owned. All of my momentos and that of my sons. Cherished possessions and those not so cherished. But my memories are with me still and the love and knowledge of G-D and my family are all that really matter.
(18) Anonymous, March 25, 2010 5:44 PM
discovered two large brass matching Menorahs in an Antique Store and wondered WHY they were there, WHY left behind by their previous owners? I am thankful that HaShem allowed these Beloved Treasures to be Hidden Away for a Time...Until a Time when they might Bless My Family. Although I do not know their past History - today they hold Place of Honour sitting Center Stage on our Family Room mantle. I look forward to each Shabbat when I light them and Study Torah by their Beautiful Illumination
(17) Tsiporah, March 24, 2010 10:48 AM
I run across Judaica at second hand shops now and then. I always feel an obligation to "rescue" it and then find someone who needs it.
(16) virginia, March 23, 2010 9:16 PM
receive the gift
have you considered that the plate is exactly where it most needs to be, that it will not be more appreciated anywhere else? there are no accidents--you were meant to have the plate, tell the story. no need to judge the children for "where they are;" all we're asked is to accept & respect their choices. enjoy the plate--such a gift & blessing to you!
(15) Anonymous, March 23, 2010 5:18 PM
I have just cried tears of sorrow reading this. I have lost so much of my Mother and Father. They are in my heart but photos etc are lost to me as I live in Australia and they lived in England, with their passing it was left to my young brother and his wife in regard to the estate and neighbours informed that so much was just thrown out. Such saddness he has lost so much of our Parents. We owe it to pray for our families
(14) Anonymous, March 22, 2010 6:18 PM
Old Menorah
Dear Rabbi Several years ago I found a Menorah in a second hand shop. It was Well worn and (pardon the expression) it looked like it had been through a war. I just had to buy it and give it a good home. I too wonder why such a well used "heirloom" would end up in a second hand shop.
(13) Anonymous, March 22, 2010 12:53 PM
Rabbi Blech remember you are only a custodian
Nothing happens in this world by coincidence. In fact there are NO coincidences. The fact that G-d brought you to this item is itself a miracle and probably is part of His plan to reconect the children of Shmuel back to their Jewish heritage. Remember these things happened in the Bible. Look at the story of the prophet Shmuel (I Sam 8:1-5): "The second son of the prophet Samuel. Abijah and his elder brother Joel were appointed judges at Beersheba, but they were corrupt and perverted justice" The sons of Shmuel the prophet left G-d, but prophet Shmuel's grandson "Heman" came back to G-d and became David's chief musician and his decedants were chief musicians in the Temple of Shlomo. G-d Almighty has His ways of bringing His people back to Him. Remember if G-d chose you to be a custodian of this seder plate it might be just within His plan to reconnect Shmuel's grandson's back to their heritage. G-d might not want you to own this passover plate. Maybe you are just the custodian. The money you spent is Tsedakka for G-d. Pray about it.
(12) ruth, March 22, 2010 7:06 AM
poignant and to the point
This is a beautiful but sad story. I can say, in reading this, that you were "meant" to find this plate, to commemorate this story and to make a deep and poignant point about memory, and what we should cherish in life. Life is fleeting and Shmuel's story is "divine" and you are carrying that torch forward. It would be so wonderful if those relatives who discarded this plate came to read your story, but maybe it doesn't matter, because "we" did, and it's a beautiful, enduring message for us all. A very special Seder Plate!
(11) carmen, March 22, 2010 2:34 AM
family problem
I know my brother and I have taken opposing views to our jewish heritage. For me the kids should know about the suffering and the joy. My brother's kids will never know. But their hearts will know something is missing in the future. It's kind of like cutting down a forest to make room for new homes. If this is done too much the land becomes an uninhabitable windy desert
(10) Paula Davis, March 21, 2010 11:43 PM
treasure
When my beloved aunt Edith died, my mother inherited the brass candlesticks that had come from Riga. My mother had blessed the shabbas candles for a while, but then stopped. When I asked her to give them to me, along with a few other family mementos, my mother was glad to dispose of them. The candlesticks, the china canisters, the beautiful mustache cup, the well-worn brass mortar and pestle, were all worthless items to every one else in the family, but to me they are my legacy - more valuable than diamonds. My greatest worry is that my daughter and son will not cherish these items when I am no longer here to preserve this heritage of hope. I should start discussing these plans with them right now.
(9) Rachel, March 21, 2010 9:07 PM
Heirlooms
I'm a saver of things that belonged to my grandparents & parents. I cannot fathom how people can throw out or sell an item like this. And yet I've stopped giving "sentimental" type gifts to my own children because all they want are the latest gadgets. I would rather have the shawl my grandmother made, my father's military medals, etc. than any phone, Ipod, etc. At least Rabbi Blech will treasure the seder plate as it deserves. The original owners grandchildren, tragically, are like the 4th son mentioned in the Seder, who doesn't even know how to ask.
(8) Marie H., March 21, 2010 8:10 PM
Objects of the past on EBay...
I converted to Judaism 10 years ago, not for marriage, but for myself. I tend to look at Ebay for religious items first because I have no past with my Judaism...only my recent past. It's a joy for me to own something that once meant wondrous things to an observant family. I know when I pass on my daughter (who is not Jewish) won't feel the same way I do towards my items, but she'll pass them to someone who will respect and have reverence for them as I do. I LOVE my candlesticks. My Hebrew teacher brought them from Israel for me. They're beautiful Israeli marble. When lit they never fail to bring tears to my eyes.
(7) Mike, March 21, 2010 6:56 PM
What can we do?
Todah, What do we do to keep our children "interested" in Judiasm? I'm sure all of us know of family members that married out of the faith and go to Sunday worship in that other faith. Then there are those that not only keep Judiasm (if they were not raised in a Torah observant home) become observant...my question is why do some go one way and others go the other way?...how does it work?...many people say "it's the parents duty"...I've always thought this way (parents raising children in a Jewish home) but is it the correct way of thinking?...I have cousins who each went the opposite-two sisters-one moved to Israel,became observant is on her 7th child, the other doesn't care one bit about Judiasm...so what do we do?...is it in our DNA?
(6) Eileen, March 21, 2010 4:12 PM
The question that I ask is
Did you get in touch with his family and talk to them about why they threw away this precious seder plate. I think I would have done that. Maybe they just didn't know.
(5) Anonymous, March 21, 2010 10:48 AM
Countless sets of tefillin and candlesticks are up for grabs on eBay and yard sales because children do not value that which was so important to their elderly parents, now in nursing homes or deceased. Many years ago, as we prepared to make aliyah, my 90 year old neighbor came to me with tears in her eyes and gave me her brass candlesticks, which had been handed down to her from her grandmother. "Please take them. It will make me feel so good to know they will be used in Israel. My grandchildren are all intermarried, and I have no one to pass them on to." I light those candlesticks, as well as the simple brass candlesticks of my own great-grandmother, every Shabbos to this day.
(4) Eliyahu Rosen, March 18, 2010 3:29 PM
Great Story
Really an awesome story. You have brought all the seemingly old and archaic rituals of not only the seder, but all of Judaism into perspective in one short reflection. It's such an important concept for us to remember (and live by) in this "throw away culture" that we live in. I am going to share this with the Jewish public school students I mentor in NY. Thank you!
(3) yechiel greene, March 16, 2010 1:06 PM
what we don't know is more than what we know
1. the contents may have been disposed because the owner, having saved the plate from the Holocaust, went on to live a life which was irrelevant to this object 2. The kids may hate the father or grandfather even though he survived the Holocaust for their own reasons 3. Six broken families later, this plate may be a bitter reminder of fights and screaming at a seder 4. It's an object; it can carry stories only if we let it.
(2) Chana Leah, March 15, 2010 11:13 PM
this story reminds me of the song on the first journeys album about the torah scroll from kiev, it is very important to adopt these precious objects and make them feel useful again. maybe if we could care enough about the feelings of an ancient seder plate, our feelings of mercy would carry over to our interactions with our family and all fellow jews.
(1) Moises Benzaquen, March 15, 2010 6:23 PM
A very moving story
Dear rabbi Blech. Thank you for writing this beautiful story and touching our emotions. Indeed, without memories we are nothing. It is the dedication of our parents and love for Judaism that gave us the hope to continue to serve Hashem and His people. Thank you for puting our emotions and feelings into words. Have a wonderful Pesah with your family and may Hashem keep you strong for many years. MB