An Irreplaceable Doctor: A Tribute to Dr. Elliot Samet

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Our beloved community doctor died due to Covid-19.

I moved to Passaic, NJ nine years ago, right after my youngest daughter was born. It was a difficult time for me personally, as my father had just been diagnosed with cancer. When my father came to visit me, Dr. Samet frequently saw him at synagogue. Dr. Samet’s natural compassion was such that he noticed the new man in synagogue who appeared to be cold and shivering. No sweater could warm my father due to the sickness inside. Dr. Samet could not do enough for him. His humanity was such that he was extremely bothered by this and would tell me whenever he saw me, “What can we do for your father? I just wish we could do something for him.”

I felt the warmth of his kindness. Dr. Samet’s empathy for not only the suffering of my father but for the powerlessness of his loved ones to alleviate it, profoundly moved me. I felt an immediate bond with him that would only strengthen in the years to come.

My father’s condition worsened. I spent as much time as I could at the hospital. On the Friday before the last Shabbos of his life, I prepared to leave for the hospital. My friends came to my home to stay with my children. But when my daughter woke up from her nap, I saw that she had developed croup. As croup often does, she presented with symptoms that appeared perhaps more terrifying than they warranted. She gasped, wheezed and sounded like she could barely breathe. She cried, buried her head inside the crook of my neck and clung to me for dear life. It was the most agonizing moment of my life – to be torn between the love and duty of a mother toward her sick child, and the love and duty of a daughter toward her dying father.

I was distraught and completely immobilized. I did not know what to do. I called Dr. Samet. He said, “Go to your father. I’ll take care of your baby. She will be fine. I’ll come to the house over Shabbos. Don’t worry. Trust me and go to your father.”

And so I went. Dr. Samet made house calls to my daughter over Shabbos and personally checked to make sure that she was fine and that her croup was not dangerous. I had peace of mind knowing that she was safe and in good hands. I remained at my father’s bedside until the moment he took his last breath. I will always be grateful to Dr. Samet for gifting me that.

Dr. Samet dancing at a patient's bar mitzvah.

My father died in the morning and his funeral was held a few hours later in Brooklyn. There wasn’t much time to get the word out, as we needed to get him to the airport to reach his final resting place in Israel. While much of what took place in those ensuing hours remain a blur to me, one thing I do remember is seeing Dr. Samet’s face among the crowd. That he made the time, on such short notice, to travel to Brooklyn for my father’s funeral in the midst of his busy schedule astounded me. Perhaps I should not have been surprised. A person who felt so much, could do no less.

Dr. Samet was the old fashioned family doctor of yesteryear. The kind who makes house calls. The kind who calls after a visit to see how your child is feeling. Like the grandfather who manages to make every grandchild feel like he’s the favorite, my children each felt they shared a bond with him. Even my mother was connected to Dr. Samet. When she came to Passaic for the weekend and got sick or needed a doctor, he would always see her without fail.

There were so many things to admire about Dr. Samet, even beyond his medical skill and dedication. His connection to God – he said a prayer before giving each child a shot. His humility – he insisted my husband call him Elliot and not doctor. His commitment – his zeal for the safety of the community’s children was legendary, providing education on many issues including wearing sunblock, helmets when bicycling, and avoiding drinking on Purim.

There are so many stories told about Dr. Samet. These are but a small glimpse of my own. Perhaps the most descriptive story is this: upon hearing the news of his passing, three generations of my family cried.

Our relationship with Dr. Samet will not end. It will transform into a new kind of relationship. A relationship of memories. A relationship where we call upon his wisdom and remind ourselves of what Dr. Samet would say, and what Dr. Samet would do. A new pediatrician may preside over our children’s future well visits, but Dr. Samet will always be our family doctor.

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