I Deserve

Why do so many kids cry at their own birthday party?

Comments (21)

(21) Iris Moskovitz, June 7, 2009 7:01 PM

So true,Lori

I beleive that most of us needed to hear the brilliant words of mussar you presented here. Thank you!

(20) Anonymous, May 10, 2009 9:50 PM

So nice!

Today, I was waiting for a phone call - I felt entitled to it, so I've been cranky that it hasn't come. This totally changed my perspective. Thank you!

(19) andrew, October 4, 2008 6:43 PM

i deserve

lori thank you one more time i think the word i deserve i will erase from my vocabularies i truelly believe that everything in life is a gift of god the world is a big surprise party take pleasure of life it is the way that our creator wants it to be whether good or bad what a great GOD .

(18) Lachrisha smith, September 28, 2008 10:32 PM

Beutifull life

Just a note to say thank you for such beutifull insight with a positive enlightenment on our CREATOR and home, this world , birthdays ,and joy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!well done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are a blessing!!!!

(17) Adam, September 28, 2008 5:15 PM

give a present to your parent

Lori, You once told of someone you know who raised his children to, on their birthdays, give their mother a present. That's what we do on Rosh Hashana - on our birthday we proclaim him our King. Ksiva v'chasima tova.

(16) Renee, September 27, 2008 8:42 PM

I totally agree with (16)chaya leah's comments - she expressed everything i feel and so well ! thank you for your inspirational thoughts and views. May Hashem continue to give to strength to do your good work !

(15) chaya Leah, September 25, 2008 7:10 PM

this was my favorite presentation !

Lori-this took the cake! what a beautiful way to bring in the new year- with feelings of everything that H-shem bestows upon us is a gift. I've been listening to your live presentations dutifully every week and you somehow always manage to convey such crucial lessons in such a pleasant and positive way- what a trademark you've made for yourself! Y'know before Yom Hadin we all feel timid and anxious- how and where to start and how to react on all the endless mussar talks... yet somehow (for me atleast) I seem to get inspired to change for the better through positive talk...thanks so much for the positive inspiration! Shana Tova to you and your family and all the beautiful messages you've spoken about this year that have made people change and feel good- what a tremendous zechus for you!! keep it up -we await a new year full of your lori lives!!

(14) Moshe, September 25, 2008 6:44 PM


I want to thank you for inspiring all of us every week throughout the year. You should merit to do this until 120~! Ksiva Vchasima Tova- shana tova!!!!!!!!!

(13) Andy, September 24, 2008 9:56 PM

God is good and God is just requires a step of faith

to believe that we are entitled to nothing and that everything is a gift seems to me to be the truth. by choosing not to commit suicide we are choosing to live and therefore should be thanking our Creator for life. As we were given free will we can work on enhancing the quality of our life. Doing Mitzvahs seems like a logical way to achieve that goal.

(12) Anonymous, September 24, 2008 7:19 PM

Grateful to Aish

for providing your wonderful "chats." May you continue to bring us your good sense and wit for years to come in good health. A "ksiva v chasima tova."

(11) Rachel Garber, September 23, 2008 6:05 PM

Thanks what a beautiful wake-up call

Lori, I too was expecting a video about parenting, and planned to send it to my sister, to send to her daughter. Great message to remember, especially at this time of year. How often we say things like you deserve, I deserve, frankly I think that is a problem in much of our society, so many people think they deserve things, and are angry at the world, or at HaShem because He didn't give them what they thought they deserved. What chutzpah.

(10) linda llewellyn, September 23, 2008 4:43 PM

God gives what I need

If I treated my life more of a surprise party instead of moaning about what I think I deserve in my life I would be happier. Thanks again for great advise.

(9) ruth housman, September 23, 2008 4:26 PM


This is so beautiful there's nothing to add but thanks. It's incandescent. I have been watching Lori Live for a long time and commenting here and there. It's interesting how beautiful I am finding so many of her talks and that the candle, that is within, is just so incandescent. She too glows! Such a beautiful, beautiful message!

(8) Joanne, September 23, 2008 4:13 PM


Whow! This is so beautiful and so true of me. I would love for my daughter to hear this message because she has so many blessings from God but can't see them.

(7) Dvora, September 23, 2008 12:47 PM


Lori...Absolutly beautiful!

(6) Benjamin, September 23, 2008 11:18 AM

I Did Not Realize

I opened up your blog expecting to hear about parenting. I did not realize that I was the birthday child! Thanks for the simple analogy that I can take with me during the upcoming Days of Awe.

(5) Dorit Polzer, September 23, 2008 8:40 AM


Many thanks, Lori! You are so right - and it is so hard to comprehend this message, sometimes - so I `m grateful for you tanking me one step further! - Be blessed abundantly! - Shalom, Shalom! Dorit

(4) Laylu Sokol, September 21, 2008 3:45 PM

Hope vs.Expectations

Hope is a positive feeling, while expectations just lead to dissapointment. I always enjoy what you have to say, but this message is especially important for me right now. I expect a child... and I am waiting for 1. I know the correct thing would be to hope and pray for one. Deserve, there is no way really to know what one deserves. I need to accept this, and hope and pray. Thank you for your constant wisdom...

(3) Leah, September 21, 2008 8:35 AM

Absolutely Inspiring Lori!

Once again you have given us inspiration and something good
to think about. We love all of
your video''s!
Shana Tova!

(2) Annie L. Smith, September 21, 2008 7:48 AM

I always await your articles, however, this one hit me right between the eyes when I realized I had bitterness in my spirit over some things I thought I deserved to receive, but had not - a loving supportive husband, a decent house to raise our kids in, financial prosperity so we would not have to struggle, etc. I had to repent over this and my tears are still flowing as I write. Thank you for allowing us to see ourselves as we really are, recalcitrant, ungrateful, children. Keep up the good work, you are a The Big Eraser we all need to become better partners with G-d. G-d Bless you.

(1) Rosen, September 21, 2008 4:23 AM


One of the most inevitable aspects of life is disappointments, which is often a result of our rigid, meticulous expectations. It's easier to feel deserving than it is to expect give and/or take. Perhaps what is sensitive about birthday parties are what presents to bring, and whether presents will be necessary. Even though some people say, "you don't need to bring me any presents" when in fact it may be a gesture for the opposite like from that "Curb Your Enthusiasm" episode with Larry David and Ben Stiller. When giving presents, we give the best way we can, and if the recipient is disappointed, then that's a problem lying in their side of the court, because the one who gave the gift generally does mean well with it. In particular, if only teenagers were more appreciative of the gift they get for their birthday, especially if it is a car. They shouldn't complain about it being the wrong brand or color since any car can get one to point A to point B. Otherwise, a car as a birthday gift for someone's 16th birthday is not such a good idea, because you never know how spoiled they would act towards it. Life in general is a gift where we have to find what we are thankful for and already have. L'shana tova for the new Jewish year, 5769!


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