Stranded by Friends Getting Married

I’m happy for my friend, but I’m also jealous.

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Comments (5)

(4) Aryeh Cass, December 22, 2015 6:15 PM

Friends forever

When my wife and I first got engaged to be married back in back in 1961 we and our friends formed a group we called "The Jems" for our crowd in Melbourne Australia The Jewish ,Engaged, Married, and Steadies . J E M S and we met regularly and never left anybody out of our social circle . My wife and I made Aliyah to Israel in 1971 to keep our Jewish roots alive and well Regards Aryeh Cass

(3) Anonymous, December 17, 2015 5:42 PM

Yes, but

I had a hard time as someone who got married earlier than most of my close friends. I didn't have any newly married friends and all my old friends could not relate to my adjustment and struggles. When I didn't invite them over because I was having dinner with my husband - they felt ignored. When I didn't go out because I was cooking for Shabbos - they felt I had dumped them. It was a very lonely time. Thank G-d, I am blessed that that was my challenge - but I think like everything in life - trying to see the things from the other perspective is very helpful. Thanks for the reminder and the food for thought.

(2) Sara, December 16, 2015 4:09 PM


Thanks so much fr this video as you made me feel so normal as I B'H' have a child bur I had an acquaintance who also had difficulties like us and yet she has her 3 child and yes I was jealous but now I know it is normal to get a tiny dot jealous! Thanks so much for making me feel normal!

(1) Anonymous, December 14, 2015 12:06 AM

Re: Envy.

I have a completely different type of "envy issue." My wonderful friends are all Yeshiva educated and they know much more than I do. I grew up in a Secular Jewish home, and am working to educate myself about Judaism. I wish I did not envy what my friends have, but I do. :-( The only silver lining here is when they write something down/use a Hebrew phrase that I don't understand, I run to look up the meaning online. I can't rewind the clock, but I CAN move ahead.

Miriam, December 15, 2015 12:29 AM

The Torah calls this a "good" envy.

It says "Kinat sofrim tarbeh chochmah", The Envy of Scholars Increases (Torah) Knowledge. It's good to be envious of a good thing, like Torah knowledge, because guess what? It gets us learning!


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