Last Monday in Sochi, the Canadian skier Alex Bilodeau pulled his disabled brother over the security barrier so that they could celebrate his Olympic victory together. The gold medalist freestyle skier has spoken often about his brother Frederic who has cerebral palsy. Frederic was told that he wouldn't be able to walk beyond the age of 12, but today, in his early twenties, he is still walking.
"Just like you or I, he has dreams," Alex said about his brother. "It's crazy the motivation he has and every step is very hard for him. In life, I have an easy path, and I need to go out there and do the best I can just out of respect to him. He's my every day inspiration."
When Alex slid to a stop at the bottom of the mountain last Monday night, he ran over to his brother and pulled him over the barrier so that they could celebrate his medal together.
Alex has invested hours upon hours training for this gold medal. He has slept, eaten and breathed skiing for years. Getting to that moment required a lot more than speed and talent; it required falling and freezing and reworking routines. It required patience and practice and more patience.
Frederic embodies a similar fierce determination. Every step he takes requires all of his focus. He has spent years learning how to get up and keep walking every time he falls. He has spent hours struggling with words that come so easily to most of us, and he has held onto dreams that keep eluding his grasp, with a smile on his face.
Our sages tell us that the true measure of a person is how hard we try. “The reward is according to the effort” (Ethics of Our Fathers, 5:23).
Looking at the photo of Alex and Frederic, I see two Olympic champions who have persevered.
We are each born with our own unique set of strengths and weaknesses. We can’t control all the obstacles that are thrown into our paths, but we can choose to grow from the challenges that we face. We can choose to grapple with reality or we can choose to give up. That is the gift of our free will. It is a choice that we make every moment of the day. To grow or to quit. To connect or to disconnect. To get up or to sleep. To live or to die. This is the challenge that every one of us faces.
Looking at the photo of Alex and Frederic, I see two Olympic champions who have persevered.
My Olympic Training
The photo also brought back a distant memory of skiing in Vermont. "Guys today we're going to try something different," Ryan, our ski school teacher, announced. "I'm breaking you into groups of three, and we're going to work on some teamwork." He chose leaders and gave each of us a baton to pass from one skier to another during the exercises. At first, I was happy to be chosen as one of the leaders, but then he read aloud the names of my two teammates. Darren and Lily Johnson* were sweet, red-headed twins. They were also the clumsiest, slowest skiers in the group. How was I supposed to spend the morning racing with them?
That morning was endless. First Lily dropped one of her poles and asked me to climb up and get it for her because she was too tired. Then Darren fell on the mogul stretch, and we spent a half hour trying to find one of his skis that had shot into the forest. Instead of racing, we spent the morning almost crawling down the mountain.
When we finally stopped for lunch, I clicked off my skis and went to find Ryan.
"So, how'd you do?" he asked me.
"Why did you do that to me?" I demanded.
"You know skiing isn't just about effortless speed. It's about staying the course when you're freezing cold, and someone else loses their ski. If you really want to excel at anything you need to learn how to slow down and do things that are hard for you."
"That's ridiculous. I'm the only one who got stuck with two incompetent skiers all morning. Why me?"
"Because you needed it the most. One day you're going to understand and know why."
I was furious. What was he talking about? But after a few years I found my answer. A friend of mine invited me to join her on Midnight Run, a group of students who packed up meals and distributed them to the homeless in Manhattan. And the more I gave, the more I learned. I learned how a real champion is someone who can climb outside herself and give. And slowly, I began to change. I tutored needy children. I visited patients in nursing homes and hospitals. I sat down and listened to the homeless people as they ate, and I marveled at the sheer enormity of effort it took most of them to get through the day. I tried to keep these lessons of giving in my heart, and be aware of choices before me throughout the day, to speed past opportunity or to slow down and transform the moment into an infinite gift.
Although I spent many days racing down that mountain, I can't remember any of them the way I can recall that morning I spent with Lily and Darren. How hard it was for me to make slow turns and climb back up the moguls when all I wanted to do was fly down the slope. How extraordinary the persistence of the twins was as they skied. How they kept getting up no matter how many times they fell. How they kept smiling through it all. They gave me a lasting gift that day.
They taught me that there are some Olympics that happen on the sidelines every day without anyone noticing. We begin and fall and begin again. We go back up the mountain to pick up a friend’s pole. We slow down and help someone else stand up. We constantly choose between moving forward or slipping backward. Pushing ourselves to take that next step, say that next word, and reach for that next dream.
Whether you're like Alex who pushes himself to win the freestyle mogul competition at Sochi, or like Frederic who pushes himself to choose life every day, you're a gold medal champion.
(4) Anonymous, February 18, 2014 3:40 AM
Thank you.
We enjoyed this special article. Baruch haShem.
(3) teri, February 16, 2014 4:28 PM
?
pompous. no wonder you're anonymous
zvi, February 16, 2014 8:12 PM
Not pompous, just a linguist
Teri: it is clear that anonymous is merely explaining the meaning of a term. No need to be mean or condescending.
After reading the description of "hero' for some baseball star, I was put off and decided to look up he meaning of "hero" and turns out it could merely mean a person of distinguished ability (although also courage). So hero was an acceptable term, but it annoyed me. Regardless, I was wrong.
anonymous, February 17, 2014 1:52 AM
"Pompous"??
Assuming you are referring to comment #1, you need to learn to reply or make comments without making a derogatory comment about the writer. Replies should not be made pejoratively or directed personally.
(2) Anonymous, February 16, 2014 3:58 PM
Nice article.
Thanks.
(1) Anonymous, February 16, 2014 11:17 AM
This is a wonderful uplifting article. Please do not set off a firestorm of responses with my small critique. I know the 'new normal' are children with disabilities, and this is fine with me having a son with ADHD who is a success in his professional and personal life. Nonetheless, I caution people to please not overdo the meaning of the word 'champion'. There are Olympics for the disabled wherein the word 'champion' is properly used. And of course I understand what Ms. Gutfreund was saying by using the word 'champion' to describe Frederic's heroic daily struggles to better himself. Still, I believe the use of the word 'champion' to describe Frederic's success in bettering his lot in life, like his brother who competed against others in an Olympic competition, takes away from the real meaning of the word 'champion'. Should we apply the word 'champion' to someone who successfully overcomes his or her struggles in life? This is the very definition of the word "jihad", which we know has caused and continues to cause untold misery and death in the world. I think the best definition of the word champion is simply someone who wins a fair competition against others, not someone who overcomes successfully their own struggles in life, regardless of the cause of the struggle.
Anonymous, February 16, 2014 4:32 PM
Using the word "Champion" correctly
Languages, particularly English, are not static; The definition of English words are in flux, whether for good or bad. So, I say expanding the definition of "champion" as Ms. Gutfreund did, is perfectly acceptable. And, haven't the Muslims changed the meaning of "jihad" from personal to general struggle, as in, "Let's convert everyone"?
Ayelet, February 23, 2014 3:17 AM
Internal vs external
In Pirkei Avot it says, "Who is mighty? He who conquers his inclination." Some people pride themselves in their skill and perseverance to outshine others. To other people it matters more that they fight and win their inner battles, those of character. Are you sure the second is less of a winner?