For some, the inevitability of death is frightening. For those who have faith in Jewish tradition which assures us of the continued survival of the soul after our taking leave from Earth, death is nothing more than moving from one room to another, from the corridor to the main banquet hall. The journey which we call life ends with our birth into immortality.
To understand death is to enter a realm that of necessity requires faith as a guide. No mortal has actually ever returned from the grave to give us a first-hand account. And yet most believers in the Bible as well as those of many other religions have somehow come to very similar conclusions: There is life after this life. Human beings are a wondrous combination of body and soul. The soul has its source in God; as we are told in the story of creation God blew into Adam’s body some of his spirit. God by definition is immortal. So too is a part of us, the part which truly defines us, the part which makes us who we are, the part which represents our uniqueness, the part which is the key to our essence and our being.
The Torah begins with the Hebrew letter beit. In Hebrew that letter means two. The very first message of the Torah, which tells us of the creation of this world, hints at the existence of a second world – the world to come after our sojourn here on earth.
It is a truth which demands careful attention for the way in which we lead our lives. More, it must guide us as well in the way in which we deal with the body in the aftermath of death.
Sadly, and with great pain, we must take note of a contemporary phenomenon which chooses to replace Jewish burial with cremation. This trend recently received much publicity when Rona Ramon, widow of Israel’s first astronaut Ilan Ramon, asked to be cremated in the will she left before her untimely death two weeks ago of pancreatic cancer.
I have nothing but the greatest admiration for Rona Ramon. The manner in which she lived her life was inspirational beyond measure. Unfortunately, the way she chose to dispose of her corporeal remains was a tragic break with Jewish tradition, a tradition going back to Abraham, the first Jew, who gladly paid the fortune demanded of him in order to bury Sarah in the “Cave of the Couples” and a place where according to the midrash Adam and Eve are buried as well.
It was heartbreaking to read the reason that motivated Rona to request cremation. A mother of four when her husband perished as the Columbia spaceship disintegrated upon its ill-fated return to earth, she had to survive the additional tragedy of the death of her son in a training accident after the crash of the F-16 fighter pilot he was flying. With the heavy weight of these tragedies of the past upon her, Rona concluded – as she wrote before her passing – she did not want her children and family to be forced to go through yet another funeral.
It is not for me to judge her or God forbid to offer criticism. Clearly the tragedies of her past were responsible for her personal decision. But I believe it is necessary to remind ourselves what millennia of Jewish history have identified as the most fitting and respectful way to honor our loved ones once their souls have departed.
Jews perform an interesting symbolic ritual in response to the death of our closest relatives. It is called kriah – making a rip in one's garment. People think the purpose is to allow physical release, to tear something as a sign of anger. That is not the way the mystics of the Kabbalah explain this ritual.
The relationship between garment and body symbolically parallels the connection between body and soul.
The relationship between garment and body symbolically parallels the connection between body and soul. Clothing covers us; it isn't our essence or our identity. If a garment we wear gets ripped it doesn't actually affect us. Our true selves remain intact. So too, our bodies are the "garments" of our soul. They are external to it; one is independent of the other.
Death is the rending of our outer garment. But it is no more than that. That's why the mourners perform the mitzvah of kriah, to affirm that as painful as the loss of a loved one may be, there is great comfort in knowing that "the ripping of the garment" hasn't diminished the actual person.
Yet much as death diminishes the significance of the body, we shouldn't fail to emphasize the powerful linkage that remains even after death severs the connection between the physical remains and the soul. The soul owes its life on earth to the body. For a long time the two of them coexisted in a mutually beneficial relationship. When the soul departs at death, tradition tells us it does so in stages. It hesitates before bidding final farewell to its physical partner. Like a magnet, the soul continues to be drawn to the site of its former longtime residence. It stays close to the body, finding it difficult to accept the reality of ultimate separation.
Almost all religions and cultures acknowledge the relationship between body and soul that extends beyond death. In Judaism there is particular sensitivity to the soul’s concern for respectful treatment of “the earthly garment” that enabled it to carry out its life's mission.
The body is carefully washed, even though it will soon disintegrate. For as long as possible it needs to be accorded the dignity it earned during life. The body retains its right to modesty; only women may prepare a female body for burial and only men a male. The corpse is to be put into a closed coffin so that onlookers not are left with the memory of a diminished human being.
Honoring the body is a way of showing our respect for the soul that remains close by until it is assured that its material partner received proper treatment.
More striking still, Jewish law forbids those in the immediate presence of the dead to eat and drink or to fulfill a mitzvah – because that would be mocking them, inasmuch as they are now incapable of doing the same. The corpse may not know or care, but the soul of the departed does. Honoring the body is a way of showing our respect for the soul that remains close by until it is assured that its material partner received proper treatment.
It is surely significant that throughout history those who most wanted to bring about the end of the Jewish people sought to do it through fire. Both temples in Jerusalem were put to the torch and burnt. The Nazis built crematoria to carry out The Final Solution. In Hebrew the word for garbage is ashpah – a contraction for aish poh, "fire is here," because the most common way to get rid of the useless was to burn it. We cannot justify doing to ourselves what has been and continues to be the way of our enemies – to burn and to destroy the last remnant and reminder of people we loved.
Our Arab enemies have long understood the Jewish passion and commitment to preserving the dignity of bodies which housed Jewish souls. That is why they have demanded exorbitant ransoms for the return of Israeli bodies, hundreds of Palestinian terrorists for the remains of even one Jewish soldier.
Rona Ramon wanted to spare her grieving children and family the trauma of her burial. In years to come her loved ones will have no physical place to mourn, to visit, to remember and in some small way to be with her at graveside. That makes her cremation another cause for tears.
We dare not judge Rona Ramon, a heroic figure who endured loss beyond comprehension. But let us reaffirm the powerful words of King Solomon, “And the dust will return to the earth from where it came and the spirit will return to God who gave it” (Ecclesiastes 12:7).
See also:
(31) Tziporah Conklin, July 23, 2020 3:41 AM
deep appreciation for article, yet at times traditions can't be done: what then?
My husband David died nearly 10 yrs ago: I was determined to give his precious body a Jewish burial--no Hadesha Hevura, so I washed & shrouded his body. a carpenter friend made a simple wood coffin & we buried him w/o the pagan embalming our society deems necessary. I sat shiva & thanked HaShem I could give him the simple Jewish burial he wanted. 4 yrs. later, I began care for my dad for 6 yrs--I offered him my grave next to David,to make a coffin & shroud, but no, he chose cremation. I still feel guilt for doing as he wanted. Years after his mother, my granny died, I found in her will her 1st choice was essentially Jewish burial, to be wrapped in a shroud & buried quickly in a plain wood coffin, but my dad had her body cremated. I'm so sad I couldn't fulfill her initial choice. How do I let go these regrets &
should I feel bad that I didn't find men to prepare my David for burial? Is there prayer(s) to be said at a graveside? Kaddish? Oh, & I'm planning to bury my dad's & granny's ashes & put a stone there. Are there prayers to be said at that? I have "SIDDUR IMREI EFRAIM/THE COMPLETE ARTSCROLL SIDDUR / Nusach Sefard (my Jewish ancestors came from Spain via Ireland). Toda raba
(30) Anonymous, May 6, 2020 7:28 PM
Response to the Cremation Question
My husband, Morty, passed away suddenly at his job. Going through the shock of his death was traumatic. Fortunately, I had relatives and friends to guide and support me through the process. He died at Sukkot, which meant that every local rabbi was busy. Upon speaking with the Chabad rabbi, he agreed to perform the service the next day at the Hebrew cemetery.
Three days after he passed, I finally found my husband's will. In reading it I found his instructions that he was to be cremated and have a Masonic service only. We had discussed this previously and I had somewhat vehemently told him I could not do that. First, I should say that I am Jewish by choice and both of my parents were cremated. Their decision was difficult for me because I felt it did not respect them. It made my grief that much worse.
My son has verbal instructions from me that when the time comes, I am to have a Jewish service and burial. While the body is a vessel for the soul, it be respected in death. While I did not follow my husband's instructions, I followed my heart. I do not regret my decision.
(29) David E Kamins, June 6, 2019 3:31 PM
The explanation makes alot of sense & that is what I ask for when I ask for reasons for policies.
A beautiful explanation that I accept completely.
(28) Linda, January 5, 2019 5:21 AM
Thank you Rabbi, the article is much needed in a time when idol worship or atheism is promoted on TV and social media and doubts concerning the topic may arise, but you confirmed burial is the way of the Torah as Hashem buried Moses Himself.
(27) David E Kamins, December 31, 2018 7:29 PM
Jews do not understand this cremation information.
Your explanation is persuasive to me. I will give copies of your explanation to others.
(26) Kevin, December 27, 2018 3:41 AM
Is it true that most people have a Autopsy before they are taken to a Funerall home? If so, that must be costly and added to the final cost of burial or cremation. I feel that most people who die don't need this and,it may be practice for medical students. Just wondering. About cremation, I have always felt that it was wrong. We live in a time where every thing is so inflated a persons death should not be so expensive forcing people to chose cremation. Some one wrote that cremation has triplled since 2005. That is Greed and Greed is a Sin! I am getting older myselve and on a low fixed income. I do not want to be cremated and pray to G-D that I be buried in my Family plot. Thank you Rabbi Blech for another great article! Shalom Jerusalem Israel!!!
(25) Frederik Geubel, December 25, 2018 6:35 PM
Burning not respectful?
Is cremation not respectfully for the past away body? And so to say, will the soul to be sad when this happens and find no rest?
(24) Merle Lewis, December 25, 2018 3:38 PM
cremation,right or wrong. I am noahide but believe the Jewish way
I read that cremation is to be avoided due to customs necessary for the dead. However, the Holocaust resulted in millions being 'cremated'. An explanation, please.
(23) Anonymous, December 25, 2018 4:59 AM
Funeral costs solution
If you buy a life insurance policy for a $25k payout, it is inexpensive. This amount can be earmarked for burial expenses, so your loved ones won't have funeral expenses
Anonymous, December 27, 2018 5:11 PM
Cost
Thank you for your suggestion. Regarding taking out a small life insurance policy to pay for a burial, please understand that what may seem “inexpensive” to some is not to many. I’ve looked into it and for those on a very small fixed income barely able to cover living expenses in today’s world (quickly increasing cost of housing, food, gas), the cost of an insurance policy to cover a burial just doesn’t fit in. I think Jewish cemeteries should offer less expensive burial options. The world seems to think all Jews have money. It’s sad that much of the Jewish community assumes so as well.
(22) Ira M. Pesserilo, December 24, 2018 11:05 PM
cremation
When you get a huge unexpected financial obligation, and the professional funeral industry comes along, and wants an exorbitant sum , now this guy is telling us we have an obligation to be hung out to dry? Money is for the living, not the dead.
Harvey Sinclair, December 25, 2018 8:33 AM
Ira, you are right, if you..................
believe the dead no longer to exist as spiritual souls. We learn that their bones are their earthly connection, and to deprive departed souls that right, because of a fad, of another religion's culture, well, we're letting the team down. We value every Jewish soul.
(21) ROBIN MEYERSON, December 24, 2018 5:32 PM
burial is worth the money and can be affordable with education
I have helped many people do burial instead of cremation. The Jewish Free Loan works with many families to make burial very affordable. People can also buy a very small monthly life insurance policy that can be used to pay for burial. In addition, in many communities, Orthodox rabbis have special funds to help. And there is also the Jewish Free Burial Society for the truly indigent. I helped a mother one time who's son died and they had absolutely no money and the city helped to pay for a Jewish burial. Where there is a will there is a way. Burial is affordable if you do your research and contact your local orthodox chevra kadisha. start by contacting the National Association of Chevra Kadisha. www.nasck.org. Also when one is considering important things like, who to marry, where to live, what college to go to, burial should be up there too as it affects the soul's eternity. Cremation can't be undone and burial is the safer choice ALWAYS.
(20) Sharon, December 24, 2018 4:09 PM
Cremation
This was not only well written, was respectful and so informing. Just great way to help Jewish people understand.
(19) Nancy, December 24, 2018 12:25 PM
Re: The issue of cost
Dear Rabbi--
Since this issue was brought up more than once in the comments, I wonder if it can be addressed in another column. This does NOT mean I am in favor of cremation! However, a proper Jewish burial is an expense. Many people wonder how they will be able to pay for said expense. If you or anyone else can make suggestions/offer feedback, I am there. Kol tuv.
(18) sarita, December 23, 2018 11:37 PM
Coffin or cloth?
I have a question for the Rabbi. I thought that the Jewish tradition was to inter the corpse wrapped in a cloth and that the tradition of a coffin is a gentile tradition. In Israel, that is still the tradition. Is this incorrect?
James ben Sarah, December 24, 2018 6:15 PM
Ash to ash and dust to dust
Rona Ramon chose to be like her husband and son in death as in life.
Rachel, February 2, 2020 4:54 PM
Coffins are required in many places
Outside Israel, many jurisdictions do not permit interment without some sot of casket To follow the law of the land, Jews will still clean and dress the corpse in simple white garments, wrap in a sheet, and then place the corpse in a plain wooden coffin The plain coffin will eventually disintegrate in the grave
If you are concerned about the environmental impact of of burial, the Jewish method, with no embalming, clothing the body in simple natural garments (no polyester), and burial in a plain coffin (no linings, no nails) is better for the environment than other methods, including the heat required to cremate I have been on Chevra Kadisha and was impressed by the elegance of volunteers preparing the body and the simplicity of washing, dressing, and placing the body in a plain box
(17) Anonymous, December 23, 2018 10:28 PM
helping me with the loss of a friend.
Lost contact with one of my friends, when trying to find a good phone number to call her yesterday, as her old number had been disconnected, I re entered her name Barbara Sanders Los Gatos found an obituary, so sad, as I hadn't spoken to her for a long while, your blog helps me as well, as I just found out a year or so ago through 23 and me that I am also of Jewish descent=ashkanzai?sp? wanted to share this with Barbara, anyway I have prayed for her remembered her in my thoughts, and your sharing of burial helps to make decisions we all have to reckon with, thank you, Best Wishes, Tricia
(16) Betty, December 23, 2018 9:28 PM
We dare not judge
The Rabbi says we dare not judge Rona Ramon, but he does a good job of it. He uses the word tradition - that is because there is no commandment NOT to cremate...It is simply tradition and in today's world tradition occsionally has to make way for the realities of the time.
Alan S., December 24, 2018 12:24 AM
I beg to differ... again.
Please re-read the article. I know words that can surely be said to "judge", but those words were not found in this article. Again, the Rabbi is not judging Ms. Ramon. He couldn't have put it more plainly than when he wrote "We dare not judge Rona Ramon."
He clearly writes to present our faith's tradition, which is contrary to what Ms. Ramon did. I believe he is using Mr. Ramon simply as a well known person to teach by example.
This said, your opinion is as to "the realities of time" may be valid to many, but most Jewish people will subscribe to the ideas of our traditions. If this tradition is not for you, so be it.
(15) Sara, December 23, 2018 7:42 PM
Tradition versus Cost
Although I would prefer the tradition of burial, the cost is prohibitive to me as I have no relatives or financial assistance. After a great deal of searching and inquiring of various places, I discovered that the only thing I could afford would be cremation. Both my parents were also cremated for the same reason and I must admit I miss being able to visit their graves. It is quite a problem in this age where cost must fight with tradition.
(14) Anonymous, December 23, 2018 6:03 PM
Funeral costs
We are in times where the cost of a burial funeral is many thousands of dollars, way beyond the means of the average family. How much debt should a family go into to keep the tradition. When my husband died I turned to Jewish organizations for information and help. Nothing. I was able to bury him in a small cemetery I found where I could afford the most simple burial. I will be cremated. Very few seems to visit cemeteries any more. One of the worst things I saw was an old Jewish cemetery here in Illinois. There must have been hundreds of old expensive tombstones jammed together, falling over. Does that show respect for the dead? Jewish tradition is beautiful, but Judaism isn't taught any more and funerals should be for more than pricey show.
(13) Andrea, December 23, 2018 6:02 PM
It’s also a cost issue...
Nobody has mentioned the cost issue. My brother and I had to pay for the funeral of our father on our own and even the least expensive option was $17k and this was in the wall - not even the ground - 10 years ago! It was a huge financial hardship. Our mom is aging and has no funds so he and I will have to bury her too and we now each have several children to support. The Jewish cemeteries in L.A. offer no financial support unless you are impoverished, which we are not. We would feel terrible cremating our mom but I believe that in today’s economy, many people are being forced to consider it as an option due to cost. Not all Jews have the finances or will be receiving an inheritance or life insurance. What are we to do?
(12) Harvey Sincair, December 23, 2018 5:42 PM
Body and Soul
We read from our ancient Rabbis, that the bones of people who have passed, do actually have something in them, it is an earthly connection to the soul which is with Hashem. As some of your previous writers wrote, it's just simply that they haven't properly looked into things, or asked a proper Rabbi. The heart is a powerful organ, but even it needs a cross check sometimes.
(11) Anonymous, December 23, 2018 5:09 PM
Resurrection of the Dead
Why did you omit the halacha that one who instructs that their body be cremated after death will not arise when G-d resurrects the dead? See https://ohr.edu/1298.
Harvey, December 23, 2018 5:47 PM
Fads
Plain and simple answer, cremation is a "normal" way of burial, made normal by mob rule, if everybody else is doing it, it must be ok
(10) Sharon, December 23, 2018 4:26 PM
People can do what the want!!
Law or no law, anyone can do what they feel is right for them!! If her reason was because of her children then she chose to put her children first over Jewish law because only she knows what they have been through and what her children would then go through. Nobody has a right to judge her or anyone. I would choose my children and think of how they will handle the rest of their lives too!! Also, if a person she was closest to did not leave the same way he came in , she might have wanted to go that way too. I personally don’t believe in cremation (except for my dog) because to me, it is a reminder of the Holocaust but will never judge a person for making the choice to be cremated over Jewish law. Sorry!!!!! People do what they want for their own personal reasons and should not have to explain it to anyone. There are so many things that religious people say other people should do because it is Jewish Law but I have seen quite a few who are hypocrites and have done certain things themselves that I know are opposite of what they have been taught through a lifetime of studying but still judge others for doing things against Jewish law. What angers me about reading these things is that you find it necessary to name a specific person and refer to what she did as being wrong. If you want to write something about cremation and Jewish Law then do so without naming someone who did what you believe is wrong. She is gone and it is disrespectful to her grieving children.
Alison, December 23, 2018 5:07 PM
No one is judging
No one is judging. Just asking to think things through. Her children even grandchildren may someday wish they had mourned by custom or even had a place to visit if the ashes were not buried. Rituals help in healing. This is what we all need to remember when planning our funerals. In her kindness, she felt cremation helped speed the process of healing and for some, it may have and the family may have agreed to the cremation out of respect for their mother. But for others planning their funerals please view all sides and just simply ask how they would like to mourn. How do they feel about rituals? They may push the question back by saying, "It is up to you." But it isn't. It is really a family / children choice. You should know the sensitivity of your children, family and be kind to them. It is your last act of love towards them on this earth.
Rabbi Benjamin Blech, December 23, 2018 6:04 PM
Read it again
Did you miss this paragraph?
It is not for me to judge her or God forbid to offer criticism. Clearly the tragedies of her past were responsible for her personal decision. But I believe it is necessary to remind ourselves what millennia of Jewish history have identified as the most fitting and respectful way to honor our loved ones once their souls have departed.
Alan S., December 23, 2018 8:34 PM
Geez, calm down and re-read the article.
You act as if the Rabbi personally insulted you. He of course does not need me to point out, as he already did, that he was not judging Ms. Ramon. Can you tell the difference between using a historical figure as an example for teaching purposes, and denigrating the historical figure.
Finally, though I don't know this for certain, it is likely that the Rabbi probably wrote as specifically as he did for people such as yourself that often take things out of context or do not properly read or understand the words on the page.
(9) Nancy, December 23, 2018 4:00 PM
The first time I learned about cremation.........
It was in one of my classes in elementary school. (I was educated in the public schools and am from a mostly secular background). Even at a relatively young age, the concept of cremation got stuck in my craw. How could we set a person on fire? That made no sense to me at all. Having written these words, I know I need to make specific plans for when I am no longer here.
(8) Harvey Sinclair, December 23, 2018 3:33 PM
UK Reform and cremation
I am a case worker for a UK charity, who deals with financial hardship. I need to go through my clients burial schemes, and am always shocked to see this mob named the JJBS, who are the Reform (and all its derivative names) burial institution. This crew openly (Google it yourselves), have cremation as an option. This is not the Jewish way, and why any Halachic Jew would consider burial with these deviants doing Hitler's work, I'll never know.
(7) Leah, December 23, 2018 3:23 PM
Phenomenal!
(6) Norman Goldberg, December 23, 2018 3:07 PM
Torn on this subject.
I lost many relatives to the Holocaust and they were likely cremated. But I have also noted that rarely does someone go to a cemetery to visit their relatives or friends. For whatever reason, people have gotten away from making that trip, save maybe once a year. I don't live in the same state as those graves I visit as often as I can when in that town. When I can go, I try to visit all the graves and say Kaddish. Plus I keep all, Jew and non-Jew in my prayers when saying Kaddish during the non-visit times. When I die there will be no one left to say Kaddish for me or visit my grave. So when my soul returns to Hashem, my body will return to dust in a place of my choosing. Our soul is our true essence and that has and will always be in God's hands. My body was for mere conveyance of that soul, a soul I know existed many years ago in another vessel in defense of the Jewish nation. Perhaps one day this planet will wind up all rock and dust and our own dust will be scattered to the cosmos. Our body and what we do with it at the end are not what is important. It's merely the vessel to carry what is God-like, our soul. If that is what Hashem has given us then it's the only important part of us that needs saving.
Anonymous, December 24, 2018 9:34 AM
Since you sound like a believer...
But G-d Himself had said that we must be put back into the earth where we came from, does that not mean anything to you?
(5) Gail, December 23, 2018 3:03 PM
I have already said yes
I thought about the last plot next to my grandfather. Then, decided to spend the money on a trip to Israel. I have no children, no close family, no one to ever come and why. I've never been to my close brothers grave after funeral. Did go to New York for another brother. I'd much rather visit Israel and leave money to IDF. No one will come. I have been to the family plot. Although 2 brothers are elsewhere about 4 times in the 27 years my mother and uncle have been gone. I bring flowers, not stones. I have no desire to rot in the ground as a waste of money, I can do more. It's stupid.
Shoshana, December 24, 2018 9:32 AM
Please reconsider
i'm sorry to hear your reasons that you don't want a jewish burial. But please do it for your soul, not for anyone else who might visit your grave. Please read up on it or ask a Rabbi to teach you on the importance on being buried whole.
In Israel when there is a terrorist attack and body parts are everywhere, Zaka works for hours to pick up every piece and to wipe up every drop of blood to be buried properly. It is not to be taken lightly.
Good Luck!
Anonymous, December 24, 2018 3:17 PM
If you do it, they will come.
I'm from Mexico City. I studied in a Jewish school from kinder to middle school. My first teacher ever, my "lererkeh" from my first year in the kinder, passed away not too long ago. She never had children. She had been a widow for several decades, as her husband was much older. She was also a Bundist. Her burial was held according to strict Halachah in the Jewish cemetery in Mexico City. Hundrends of her pupils gathered there and said kaddish for her. Her yorzeit is also observed by many.
(4) robin Davina Lewis Meyerson, December 23, 2018 2:56 PM
50 percent of American Jews are Choosing Cremation Due To Lack of Knowledge
According to the National Association of Chevra Kadisha, 75 percent of Jews who die on the west coast of America are choosing cremation, and Jews on the East Coast its 25% choosing cremation. This is mainly due to a lack of education. There is a great website www.peacefulreturn.org that shows that Jewish burial is the green environmental way to go. it doesn't pollute the environment like cremation does and provides a comforting transition for the deceased person and the rest of the family. Very few people realize what happens in a cremation but if you look it up on a video the body burns and the bones are crushed for up to 3 hours. This is violent. Burial is gentle and the natural way.
Rachel, January 8, 2019 8:00 AM
You are absolutely right about environmental impact
I served on Chevra Kadisha. The deceased is washed in water, dressed in natural fabric garments (typically cotton), placed on a bed of straw, and because US jurisdictions require a coffin, the deceased is finally placed in a plain wooden casket.
Some of the outrageous costs of funerals come into play for embalming, velvet linings, steel coffins, etc. Chevra Kadisha members are not paid for performing this mitzvah.
The Jewish burial practices are also environmentally friendly. Crematoria pollute the air and use a tremendous amount of energy. Embalming fluid and metal and synthetic coffins and burial clothing also pollute the ground.
I would suggest that everyone look into these matters while young and in reasonable health. It is easier to specify one's wishes after calm consideration and comparison shopping then when a death is imminent or recent and emotions are running high. For US veterans and their spouses, burial in a veterans cemetery is a free veteran's benefit, although one should ascertain where the nearest vets cemetery is located and whether a burial can be accommodated in the short time frame specified in Jewish tradition.
(3) Jankel, December 23, 2018 2:27 PM
Belief, doen't replace experience and evolution
Millions of people haven't gone to ancestors graves as they are vanished for centuries and millennias and the argument of the Nazis' attitude doens't work as there was no place nor time toi bury otherwise hundreds of Thousands corpses. At war and Massacres, People vanish into ashes and dust before one can find them to bury them!
Our old times attitude is obsolete and we have to find an other way for reacting the respect of human being.....
How will you bury in Israel, millions of people decently in the coming centuries?
No chance for Tradi Undertakers but Cremation tripled its prices since the year 2005! So Mr Undertaker is always right!
david, December 23, 2018 2:59 PM
wrong!
Belief doesn't replace "experience!" and evolution. You are right, it comes before it and outlives it
(2) Sharon, December 23, 2018 1:39 PM
another possible reason for Rona's choice
Since Rona has not shown herself to be anti-religious, I can think of two reasons for her choice.
1) her husband's body was effectively incinerated, so she had to convince herself that "it did not matter". Obviously it was not his choice, but a result of an accident, but perhaps she had to convince herself that it made not difference.
2) the burial place next to her husband which was supposed to be for her, was used to bury her son. Perhaps, she didn't like the thought of being buried elsewhere so she forfeited the burial altogether. I
It is very sad, but as the author points out, Rona was a courageous and kind woman, and that is not negated by this unfortunate choice.
I hope that kaddish will be said for her.
(1) Anonymous, December 23, 2018 12:23 PM
Thank you for writing this. I just wanted to point out that unlike your statement, "The corpse is to be put into a closed coffin so that onlookers not are left with the memory of a diminished human being," this is generally not the case in Israel where people are not buried in coffins but rather in a Tallis (prayer shawl/shroud). The only Jews that are buried in coffins in Israel are (all) soldiers and certain victims of terrorist attacks, where unfortunately the entire body might not be intact.
Anonymous, December 24, 2018 8:42 PM
It's true that in Israel they don't use coffins generally, but the corpse is covered in the tallis, not on display to the people at the funeral.