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While living in the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve were told by God that they can freely eat and enjoy everything the Garden had to offer. They just couldn't eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Bad. A serpent came along and enticed Eve to eat fruit from this tree. After she ate from the tree, she gave some of its fruit to Adam. When God confronted Adam and Eve about their blatant disregard for His instructions....
"The man said, 'The woman whom you gave to be with me - she gave me of the tree, and I ate.' The woman said, 'The serpent deceived me, and I ate.' "
A LIFE LESSON
When people do something wrong, they usually have an instinctive reaction to either defend their actions or blame someone or something else for what they did.
So when God asked Adam why he ate from the tree, the first thing Adam did was go on the offensive, saying that he ate from the tree because of "the woman whom you gave to be with me..." According to Adam, his sin wasn't a result of his choices; it was because of a something that God did.
And when Eve was confronted about her actions, she also refused to take any responsibility for her free-will decision, and instead simply said, "The serpent deceived me..." Adam and Eve were punished by God not only for not listening to Him, but for also immediately casting blame for their actions elsewhere.
It's always easier, more convenient, and far less embarrassing to shift blame onto other people, circumstances, or to society for any negative or destructive decisions and actions we might make. Clearly, this isn't what God wants. Rather, he desires us to personally take complete and full ownership over everything that we do.
The reason for this is that there's nothing more empowering and liberating than personally taking true responsibility for all your actions. This is life-changing because you now have power to "choose and become" as opposed to being stuck in the "blame game." Power to choose right from wrong. Good or bad. Action or inaction. You will never again be a victim of circumstances, but rather will become a proactive decision maker who - through making the right choices - can recreate him/herself anew every day.
This isn't easy to do because it goes against our nature to immediately declare "I was wrong." But when you can truly acknowledge to yourself that it's you - and you alone - who's responsible for whatever you do - and not anyone or anything else - then you will have taken complete and total control of your life. And when you take full responsibility for everything you ever do, then you'll have recaptured ownership of your life and with God's help you can do and become anything you've ever dreamed possible.
(19) William, January 29, 2017 1:56 PM
It is good to take control of your life and serve thru wisdom
(18) Joy Vei, October 26, 2016 9:59 PM
This is empowering..... grateful for the insight.
(17) Anonymous, October 8, 2015 11:54 AM
Great article! Thanks for posting!
(16) Anonymous, October 15, 2014 1:38 PM
Excellent!
This is excellent! Thank you so much for posting this!
(15) Lisa, September 22, 2013 11:15 AM
The Blame Game is so yesterday
Yes.... This year lets start making better & smarter choices so we won't have to point fingers at others!!!
(14) Edwin Hissink, October 7, 2012 8:30 PM
So sort, so important lesson
Thank you for this insight
(13) rahul bhola, August 9, 2012 8:18 PM
hello
very important to inculcate this approach in our life...thanks
(12) Rabbi Mordechai Pearlman, January 19, 2012 8:54 PM
Excellent take on the parasha
It is important to examine all points of views when it comes to Torah. I reccommed this website as outstaning source for learning
(11) Marjolein, October 22, 2011 5:28 AM
Glad I stumbled across you
It is brilliant to have a positive twist to the Adam and Eve story for a change. I found this very inspiring. Thank you.
(10) Lisa Rooney, October 2, 2010 6:07 PM
Guilty
This week I have been going through some extremely stressful things in my life and trying to keep as much as I could of it from my husband. I didn't want him to have another stress attack. Although the things I have kept could have been shared with him, he has had so much on his plate and had a stress attack last week before services I just couldn't take the chance of him having another one. Anyway, I thought I could take care of this by myself, and should have been able to, but when it came down to a company taking out money that we had not given them permission to take out at that time, and were not able to get it back, I had to tell him. Since then, both of us have been extremely stressed and thankfully we have not taken it out on each other. I am so incredibly thankful that Bereshit is this weeks Torah portion. It has touched my heart and soul and calmed me as I read that I was to blame for this happening and only me because of the responsibility I placed upon myself until absolutely necessary. Even then, I took back the responsibility because my husband could not do anything about what we were and still are going through. I am hoping I can get the rest of the things taken care of by Monday or Tuesday. I thank you so much for your interpretation of the Torah. Your interpretation has reminded me that I cannot put blame onto another just because it is convenient or embarrassing.
(9) Rich, September 29, 2010 1:24 AM
Great Analysis!
Thank you for your insights. Very powerful.
(8) Tina, October 14, 2009 1:04 PM
Whatever we sow and care for in our own gardens, is the harvest we can expect to flourish, whether for good or for evil. That is the responsibility of the farmer, and their choices. A humble gardener is a patient worker who learns and grows out from mistakes and wrong deeds sown in haste. The humble sower finds great value in self exposure that brings self correction, knowing there is treasure to be had in confession, through the learning experience, Finding honor in owning up to ones own failings and mess ups. They understand others receive and also become liberated to embrace the truth, not sifting the blame as it only prolongs ones heart and mind from the freedom that is only a confession away. Thank you great teaching...
(7) Martin Ramos, October 9, 2009 5:45 AM
Wow! I'm just like Cain!
I just realised that I am just like Cain. Just yesterday my dad took me out for lunch and asked me to control my temper (I lose my temper quite often). I blamed it on the people I was angry with. The truth is: I am responsible for my own actions and temper tantrums. I felt awful yesterday. It was humiliating to hear my father criticize me like that yesterday. After reading this article, it somehow makes it OK. Owning up to my childish attitude has lifted a weight from my shoulders. It's like: OK! I have a problem. No I can do something about it! Great! Thank you for your insights!
(6) meredith sangalang, October 7, 2009 2:31 PM
sin lead to another
true enough, your article summed up the general idea that sin leds to another, for most is the consequence of blaming other, toward broken relationship. Hence, lets always come to redeeming power of God to learn and accept the blame on any of our misgivings to rectify things as God wants it to be.
(5) Anonymous, October 19, 2008 8:49 PM
that was a very meaningful message for all of the jewish people!!!! thanks!!!!
(4) Scott Granowski, October 5, 2007 4:56 PM
Owning My Wrongs
Thank you for your insight on Adam and Eve's downfall. I, too, find it difficult to simply own my wrong without providing explanations (which are inevitably excuses). When I do own my wrong, I am always pleasantly surprised by the reaction. However, my perfectionism arises again and often prevents my memory of how connecting and good it was to own it. Your article reinforces that one of the first lessons of Torah is owning my wrongs. Great article.
(3) Catherine Manna, October 1, 2007 11:02 PM
One of the best articles i'v ever read!
there's nothing more empowering and liberating than personally taking true responsibility for all your actions. This is life-changing because you now have power to "choose and become" as opposed to being stuck in the "blame game." Power to choose right from wrong. Good or bad. Action or inaction. You will never again be a victim of circumstances, but rather will become a proactive decision maker who - through making the right choices - can recreate him/herself anew every day.
(2) Mr. W.H.Rozendaal, June 22, 2006 12:00 AM
The artical about putting someone aside when you do not need them anymore
rely moved me.Both because it happened to me,and i could be more carefull when it comes to paying attention to someone who helped me.
(1) Lara Silbert, January 6, 2006 12:00 AM
This article touches my heart
As a 22 year old just maturing into an adult woman, I am beginning to realise how important it is to take responsibility for your own life and not place blame on others for your own weakness, consciously or subconciously. It is so easy to gloss over own one's faults while picking over another person's with a microscope! This article really hits home how valuable it is to be your own strong independent person, and to answer for your own actions.