GOOD MORNING! Perhaps with Purim coming up I can justify to myself the space to share with you the following two humorous pieces. Please, do NOT write me about my wasting this week's edition and that you're missing a spiritual uplift. Humor is also a spiritual uplift (if it is uplifting humor...). Secondly, my wife agrees with you and has already expressed your opinion with clarity and sufficiency.


  • When the going gets tough, upgrade.
  • He who laughs last probably made a back-up.
  • If at first you don't succeed, blame your computer.
  • A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine.
  • For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction.
  • The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions.
  • When you need to send an email quick, that's when the modem won't connect!
  • When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen.
  • To err is human ... to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human.
  • A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want it to do.
  • When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it's probably obsolete.
  • The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual where you least expect to find it.


Then: Long hair.
Now: Longing for hair.

Then: Keg
Now: EKG.

Then: Acid rock
Now: Acid reflux.

Then: Paar.
Now: AARP.

Then: Getting out to a new, hip joint.
Now: Getting a new hip joint.

Then: Moving to California because it's cool.
Now: Moving to California because it's hot.

Then: Our president's struggle with Fidel.
Now: Our president's struggle with fidelity.

Then: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your parents.
Now: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with your kids.

Then: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.
Now: Trying not to look like Marlon Brando or Elizabeth Taylor.

Torah Portion of the Week

This week's reading is an architect's or interior designer's dream portion. It begins with the Almighty commanding Moses to tell the Jewish people to bring an offering of the materials necessary for the construction of the Mishkan, the portable sanctuary.

The Torah continues with the details for constructing the Ark, the Table, the Menorah, the Tabernacle (the central area of worship containing the Ark, the Menorah, the Incense Altar, and the Table), the Beams composing the walls of the Tabernacle, the Cloth partition (separating the Holy of Holies where the Ark rested from the remaining Sanctuary part of the Tabernacle), the Altar and the Enclosure for the Tabernacle (surrounding curtains forming a rectangle within which was a large area approximately 15x larger than the Tabernacle).


Dvar Torah
based on Growth Through Torah by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin

The Torah states, "In the rings of the Ark shall be the poles; they shall not be removed from it" (Exodus 25:15). However, the Torah teaches us that the poles of the brass altar were removed. Why were the poles of the ark treated differently than the poles of the brass altar?

The Chizkuni, a 13th century French rabbi, writes that the poles of the brass altar were removed because it was located in a place where people had to pass by; protruding poles would have inconvenienced them. The Ark, however, was located in the Holy of Holies where only the High Priest entered on Yom Kippur. Therefore, he protruding poles would not inconvenience anyone else.

What is our lesson? We must be sensitive in our actions and with our possessions regarding others. This has particular application as to how we park our cars in a parking lot or where we stop to pick up or let off people. We must be careful not to block others.